I don’t go to strip clubs very often these days, but when I do, I end up checking out the dancer’s style as much as anything else. Like if she has the usual super-high platforms in, like, white vinyl? Ugh, BORING. If she can pull off erotic dance in witchy little flat heeled ankle boots? Incredible. (I’ve seen this, and fabulous legs, incredibly long black curly hair, esoteric music, and 5+ years of pole dancing experience help a lot.) Similarly, on the rare occasions I am playing video games, I prefer the ones where you can choose your character and sometimes even their outfit. I’m just going to randomly mash the buttons on the controller as my “fight style” anyway, so I just want to be the one who looks the coolest. So I actually kind of relate to this nerdy feature on Games Radar, wherein a certain Stephen Pierce, graduate of the London College of Fashion analyzes the outfits of armed witch character Alicia from Bullet Witch. However I disagree with his analysis almost totally, particularly with digusted regard to what he has to say about one school girl uniform ensemble, AKA the outfit so corny you should be embarassed to admit you are aroused by:

Employing a subtext that suggests the lessons she wants to learn are those of the flesh, this Britney meets School of Rock mash-up would struggle without the mischievous guitar-gun successory. The complimentary tonal accents in the socks and hair provide a stable foundation for the look, but overall it would improved if we could see some tit.

Oh shut up, you disgusting nerd. Anyhow, here are the getups I like: