Stop the presses! Altert the blogs! The Dead Meadow show happening tonight in Portland is a fucking hoax. Singer/guitarist Jason Simon is, according to various barroom rumors, either sick, on drugs, suffering from a nervous breakdown, fighting with band members or all of the above. In any case, he' s not on tour, and the bass player and drummer have their merchandise guy playing guitar instead (he's pretty good, but that's beside the point. Jason Simon is the BEST.). If tonight's show is like the one I saw in Boise yesterday, they'll play about four classic Dead Meadow songs, including "Indian Bones," "Sleepy Silver Door" and "Everything's Going On," do a fair job (the vocals aside) and leave the band's hardcore fans heart-fucking-broken at the end of the evening.

Oh why must the rock gods manipulate my tender musical sensibilities so callously with rough, unwashed hands! If my favorite band ends up being just another bunch of no-account junkies, I'll be despondent for HOURS.