Hey lefty—it’s time to get your swerve on!

Well, not now, exactly. In an hour and a half. Progressive Happy Hour kicks off at 5:30pm at hotshit new bar Ron Toms, SE 6th and Burnside.

If you like talking politics with liberal movers and shakers, and if you like getting blitzed while doing said talking, there ain’t no better place to be.

Of course, you don’t want to get there and look like a total schlub with nothing to say, so here are some conversation topics you can do some research on in the next hour:

1. If Kevin Mannix wants to ban strip clubs, isn’t it our progressive duty to see publicly naked bodies at every opportunity?
2. Smoking: Bad for your health, or the quickest way to fund health insurance for children? Who’s more important, you or impoverished children? That’s what I thought.
3. Isn’t the term “rainy day fund” kind of an insult to Oregonians? If we’re talking about socking money away for downtimes, shouldn’t we call it a “sunny day fund”?
4. Who are you trying to kid with that bow tie?
5. So, where’d you go to school? Oh reeeeeallly?
6. Are you drinking PBR to appear working class, or because you’re ironic, or because you’re as poor as me?