People come up to me all the time and ask, “Hey, aren’t you Wm. Steven Humphrey, the celebrated pitcher for the awesome Mercury Softball Team who were league champions for two amazing seasons in a row?”
And I say, “Yes.”
Then they say, “How do you guys do it? How do you so consistantly win, win, and then win again?”
And while I usually tell them to get stuffed, because they’re too weak to handle our secret, I’ve decided that “success should be shared.” The reason why we always win is because we never start a game without 1) Thanking the big man upstairs, 2) Sacrificing a goat on the sacred altar of Kalee, and 3) Watching “Michael Bolton’s Winning Softball.” The way we look at it, if Michael Bolton can be a winner, so can we.

First game of the season: June 1.