1.SIDEWALK TAPE-GATE! Ryan Frank at the Oregonian reports this morning on the Mercury’s Clean Up Squad(TM), which plans to rip up unfair tape on the sidewalk on Friday afternoon. All in good fun. But it’s a shame Frank’s editors still won’t let him run the real story, about City Commissioner Randy Leonard challenging the enforcement of the sit/lie ordinance because there still aren’t enough benches, restrooms or day access center spaces for the homeless to go. But I guess that’s life. One step at a time, eh, fellas.OREGONIAN EDITORIAL BOARD: Selective, in a fascist way…

2.PARIS IS FREE! She’s allowed to serve her sentence at home after suffering from a “medical issue” that sounds a lot like “being a posh, fussy cow.”

3.WOMAN ARRESTED FOR MAKING FACES AT DOG! This is in no way related to the previous story.

4.PEOPLE ARE DISAPPEARING! Those are the last three words of the sentence, “You know you live in a democracy when…”

Good day!