seems that a PUMA opinion page didn't like the mercury alleycat race idea

see: http://portlandmessenger.org/main.php?e=DearDabby&t=questions

however, they link to some great photos of the winners tattooing and having a good ol time here:

http://teamwreck.blogspot.com/

thanks for all the fun, mercury.

i wish someone would explain the antique bike collection of the new belgium people.

If the PUMA guy could learn to use apostrophes and other various and sundry punctuation and grammar techniques, I might feel the tiniest bit inclined to listen to his side of the story. As it is, well, he just sounds like a whining idiot.

Whether he sounds like a whining idiot or not, let the record show that the Mainstream Weekly Magazine put on an "Alleycat" and two experienced Professional Bike Messengers (TM) cleaned house. Does Sharkey have a front brake?

That's it. As of this week, the Portland Mercury is now named Mainstream Weekly Magazine.

Fuck PUMA. I've known some pretty right on messengers, but I have no time to listen to the more parochial among them whine that they should have a monopoly on the whole fixed gear thing. If you're into bikes, and you see these things around town, sooner or later you're going to get curious and check it out. I can't really see anything wrong with that. Are there idiots riding fixies? Sure. There are also idiots walking, idiots driving, and idiots on Segways. And if I'm not mistaken, the first Tour de France was raced on fixed gear bikes. I don't think messenger culture (as we know it in Portland today, anyway) has been around as long as the tour. Hey guys, don't you have some packages to deliver?

Hmm. An "alleycat" that's not an actual alleycat, CRUSHED by two messengers. Who gives a shit what they were riding. I wouldn't want to stoke the idiot fires with any flammable material, even if it was true. Strikes me that shit hasn't changed in some time with messengers but the way they are perceived by others and it's only having a negative effect on what is supremely their culture. Stop trying to be a cool guy with your track bike like you are king shit of fuck mountain. You aren't. It's a damn bike. They never acted like it was theirs only ya turd. Plenty ride road bikes. Most have both. It's not about the bike, it's about people like you. They just got sick of people like you sidling up on what they created like you own it too, and giving them a bad name while you're at it. BTW, if they had gears at the first Tour they woulda used them, but it's called technological evolution. They aren't best for road races nor are they more pure. Only idiots think that or use it as an excuse to ride one when they aren't capable of it. Clearly in this case those riders were the capable ones. Give them gears and they'll shut you up still. Yeah, they do have things like your paycheck or hundreds of thousands of dollars in bank deposits to deliver. Don't you have to stick your head in a toilet so you can release the build-up of crap that you purvey as inside knowledge?

"They just got sick of people like you sidling up on what they created:"

Bike messengers created track bikes? Interesting. I had no idea of the depths of my own ignorance.

I guess introducing the notion that misanthropic gophers shouldn't be telling the rest of us what kind of bikes we can and can't ride has really struck a nerve. Sounds to me like you've been delivering other people's paychecks a little too long. Take a vacation.

"Bike messengers created track bikes? Interesting. I had no idea of the depths of my own ignorance."

Wow TJAZZ. You actually think I meant that they created the track bike, and that I ever said you can't ride this or that. You immediately follow with the only coherence you have. Read and then understand what you are debating before you write inane babble.
But thanks for making my point a little more clear for people with your mindset.

fixed breaks fixed race, who gives a shit, ur all a bunch of whiny bitches, shut the fuck up.

however, please show more of that dudes calves, it is the reason i clicked for more pics, not for more bitch-face crybaby action..

Dabby isn't a messenger anyway he is an unemployed hanger on with a blog...

Sorry cock n roll, 'nuff said. These rantings could go on ad infinitum.

Just to clarify a few points :

Messengers did not invent track bikes but we did invent alleycat races.

Dabby is a valued member of the Portland messenger community but his opinions are his own and do not reflect those of PUMA or anyone else.

I'll try to get some pictures of Sharky's calves this afternoon, they are really impressive.

Tookis: You must've been a fun kid to pick on in school, because you really seem to get riled up easily. No, I wasn't implying that you actually believe messengers created track bikes. It was a little jab at a crack in your rhetorical ability, I didn't mean to upset your delicate sensibilities or anything... To paraphrase your own words, they're just bikes. And we're just the people who ride them. Don't take yourself so seriously, man, you're gonna give yourself an aneurysm some day. Cheers!

R. Kelley: Yeah, you're right, they did invent them, can't argue that. Perhaps next year the Mercury should call it a "gutterdog" race. And Dabby and PUMA are obviously held in the highest of esteem within the messenger community, so no disrespect there (though, admittedly, it may be difficult to interpret "Fuck PUMA" any other way... Sorry, PUMA). But I can't help but get a little frustrated with any group of folks, even when it's a very small minority within a larger pool, that think that they can keep a good thing a secret and have it all to themselves indefinitely. This is just not how life works. Remember: Elvis, the Beatles and the Stones ripped off several generations of blues musicians who saw little reward for their work, and nowadays pretty much everyone's ripping off Elvis, the Beatles and the Stones. We're just seeing the same thing here. Messenger culture doesn't exist in a vacuum, I'm afraid.

Tookis: I get it, but really, calm down. Your rhetorical skill are thorough, although they come in a bit too hot. I think TJAZZ is a shit too.

TJAZZ: You are full of nonsensical, left field thought patterns that have done nothing but contradict what you've poorly tried to make into a logical argument. You've completely missed the issue that Tookis, even though he was a bit harsh, did a very good job of pointing out. Every time you write you seem to make less sense of yourself. And if you really believe that just because something lame is happening and you can't do anything about it that that makes it okay, you're wrong, and a spineless idiot if you ever lay down when it comes to something you hold sacred and dear.

Cock N Roll: I'm with you. I came here to look at the pics and read some fun info and all we get is this. This isn't the place for it. Why do they even enable comments on these things? I mean, listen to me!

Hey wait a minute... I'M King Shit of Fuck Mountain (see comment #6)!!!

I just laughed and laughed my way through these comments.

People are mad about what they are, and about what they aren't.

I think you all just need to take the proverbial chill pill and relax.

In reference to my Dear Dabby letter...

Someone, who will remain anonymous sent me a question.
It was in regards to the Mercury, so I decided to answer it honestly, and in the sarcastic and sometimes shady style of the Mercury itself. I took the truth, wrapped it tightly with sarcasm, and smeared it with crap so it would stink from miles away.

I think I did a very good job, and if it pissed you off, I did a better job than I imagined.

I would think that the people at the Mercury spread enough shit around, it is just a matter of time before a little land's on their shoulder. I doubt they have any problem at all with my letter. In fact, it probably made them laugh. (A letter, which I might add, was not edited by me, not in the slightest. I do not edit my own stuff.)

Thank you, and good night!

Dabbalicious

I just laughed and laughed my way through these comments.

People are mad about what they are, and about what they aren't.

I think you all just need to take the proverbial chill pill and relax.

In reference to my "Dear Dabby" letter...

Someone, who will remain anonymous sent me a question.
It was in regards to the Mercury, so I decided to answer it honestly, and in the style of the Mercury itself. I took the truth, wrapped it tightly with sarcasm, and smeared it with crap so it would stink from miles away.

I think I did a very good job, and if it pissed you off, I did a better job than I imagined.

I would think that the people at the Mercury spread enough shit around, it is just a matter of time before a little land's on their shoulder. I doubt they have any problem at all with my letter. In fact, it probably made them laugh. (A letter, which I might add, was not edited by me, not in the slightest. I do not edit my own stuff.

Thank you, and good night!

Dabbalicious

Word to that, Dab.

But still, few things are as much fun as a lively debate that gets a little out of hand, I would say.

Wow people, relax already. This was just a freaking bike ride, a way to meet new people and get some exercise on the weekend. Must we be so sassy?
I had a great time and hope to be in next years race as well.
I couldn't resist snapping a couple pics of Mr.Big Calves...13 minutes to the top of Tabor from the Merc HQ? Damn.

and, where are more pics? the jump? wha?