That actually sounds very very cool. Oh dude, you should totally grow a mustache for the whole thing!

I may do that. I may do that indeed.

I'm going to follow you around making sound effects noises.

Plus ca change...

I went through it when they began doing it again in 2004. Quite worthwhile. I learned an immeasurable amount which helped my reporting afterward.

One thing, though: Why did you agree to the background check and assorted other paperwork?

Because I planned to write about it for the Trib, I wasn't fingerprinted, I authorized no background check and got no special Portland Police Bureau "volunteer" badge. Neither did the photographer who went along with me.

My classmates had to do all of that.

Instead, I sat down with then-Training Division Capt. Mike Crebs and had a conversation about my plans. That was it. Problem solved. He didn't press me once to do anything differently.

Submitting to those rules compromises you, Matt. Gives them access to things about you that, as a reporter, they have no right and only a prurient interest. You need not sacrifice personal details and information to get access for coverage.

Perhaps you disagree. You know where to find me to tell me so.

But I was right about those eggplants. No reason this'd be any different. ;)

And that picture of you on this post? You look like a young — and very constipated — Maurice Mickelwhite.

Jake: If the fact I did ecstasy twice or smoked a few biftas means I can't go through the cops' training as a citizen, then the bureau's in worse shape than I thought. Still, you never know. And you WERE right about those eggplants!

As to why I didn't refuse the forms, I didn't know I could! I'm not much of a journalism geek I'm afraid, and I actually found filling out the forms informed my view of the process from the start: It's intimidating.

Thanks for posting, though. Now, when are you going to send me that list of phone numbers for all your old contacts?

And I take the young Mickelwhite thing as a major bonus. Thanks!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Michael_Caine

Just as long as we're not talking the era of the JAWS sequels.

Why should anyone have to go through a police background check to participate in their little infomercial? A local citizen can run for the fraking city council with less paperwork and no background check.

Also, you should be proud that you are not buddy-buddy enough with the cops (ie writing pro-police biased pieces to keep their goodwill) to have them give you a free pass on the paperwork.

Come hang out at the public defender's office for a week. We can teach you plenty about cops. No background checks required.

Always remember to use proper eye and hearing protection when training with firearms.

What's that, Cabbie? I can't hear you.

Local Defense Lawyer: Please contact me with your details. Let's have a chat, and I'd love to come and spend a week with you. mdavis@portlandmercury.com

Jake: I think Local Defense Lawyer just took a side-swipe at you. Might be wrong but you might want to mention that you feel dis-respected.

Matt, I had no idea you were so hot.

I did, believe me. But thanks.

Hot!? You do realize he's the one on the right?

Don't think I haven't noticed the way you look at me RT. Why keep denying it?!