• To make sure non-Republicans won’t vote in the presidential primary, the Virginia GOP will make everyone sign an oath of loyalty—preferably in blood.

• Sudan has charged a British school teacher with “religious hatred” for allowing her class to name a teddy bear “Muhammad”—a crime which could get her 40 lashes. Okay… so treat religion with respect, and beat women with a whip. Got it.

• Locally, a pedestrian in a wheelchair has been struck and killed by a hit and run driver. See, it’s not just bicycles.

• A very pregnant Christina Aguilera poses nude on the cover of Marie Claire in an apparent bid to convince us that pregnant women are just as beautiful as normal sized women. Nope. Didn’t work.