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Monday, November 5, 2007
Mercury Will the Real Matt Davis Please Stand Up?
Posted by on Mon, Nov 5 at 4:10 PM
I’m probably stating the obvious here, but lately some of Matt Davis’ comments to his own blog posts have bordered on the, um, bizarre.
Take, by way of example, the following:
Racist.Posted by Matt Davis | November 5, 2007 2:37 PM
Racist.
Posted by Matt Davis | November 5, 2007 3:26 PM
Racist.
Posted by Matt Davis | November 5, 2007 3:27 PM
Racist.
Posted by Matt Davis | November 5, 2007 3:28 PM
Mate, I’ll be a street musician. And tap dance!Posted by Matt Davis | November 1, 2007 5:51 PM
Mmmyessss….you mean I’m not really writing about this specific issue, but about the topic in general and its impact on social justice in Portland? Fuck me! I’ll make a point, yet!
Posted by Matt Davis | November 2, 2007 11:11 AM
I just hope the news section is the first part of the paper to lick ass.Posted by Matt Davis | November 1, 2007 11:43 AM
Bob R. is a fucker. There! I nailed it! And professionally, too…Now, guilty carnivore. Before I actually read your comment, could you fill me in on your credentials? Why should I bother paying attention to what you’ve just said? Where have you been published? And did you just describe something as a CANARD? Get an editor!
Posted by Matt Davis | October 31, 2007 3:11 PM
Question: Is professional sex superior to citizen sex?Posted by Bob R. | October 31, 2007 4:33 PM
I’ll do either!
Posted by Matt Davis | October 31, 2007 4:36 PM
Yeah, fuck those videos of the first World Trade Center tower getting hit — that’s not REAL, PROFESSIONAL journalism! Same with all those cell phone pics and vids of the Madrid train bombings and the London Underground bombings. GET A JOB, PEOPLE! Oh yeah, and fuck all this shit, too. CNN would never put that amateur crap on the air.
Posted by James X. | October 31, 2007 5:35 PM
Yeah! Fuck it hard, James! Fuck it SO HARD!!!
Posted by Matt Davis | October 31, 2007 6:20 PM
What was that roooo? SHHHHHSHHSHSCHSHHSHSHYou’re breaking up! SHSHHHSHHHHHH
There’s no signal up here on my pedestal. SHSHSHHSHHHH
[CLICK]
Posted by Matt Davis | November 2, 2007 11:17 AM
Comments like these have led me to wonder if it’s really Matt Davis posting, or someone posing as Matt Davis. But if someone’s posing as Matt Davis, why isn’t the real Matt Davis protesting his mockery? My head is spinning!
So I asked him. The real Matt Davis wouldn’t comment on whether or not there are sock puppet Matt Davises. He would say this: “It’s great when you can sock puppet yourself and people aren’t quite sure whether or not you’re doing it.”
Well, I’m glad I got to the bottom of that.
Comments
None of those comments are mine! Wait… all of them are!
I have at least six personalities you haven't met yet.
"Bizarre"? Compared to...?
This is so post-modern.
You're not hitting her, are you?
Uhhh...that last "Randy Leonard" is not me.
uh, I am so confused... is the plural of Davis simmilar to the plural of Lotus? Lotii?... Davii?
is Matt real? is Randy Leonard real... am I real?
Patrick
Hey, "Real Randy Leonard," why are you fucking around with Matt when you have serious e-mails in your inbox? You've built a lot of respect in North Portland. Don't piss it away.
SO tired of the bleating from Matt Davis, a chap who admits he doesn't even know the "point of Portland."
http://blogtown.portlandmercury.com/2007/08/portland_whats_the_point.php
Right, me too, bloody smashing old chap. Let's play some cricket.
This is not me, either.
Oh my! The cobblers on you Humpy! You sure luv to hear yourself rabbit. Stop being such a ginger and float me some bees, will ya guv?
Like you'd ever say that, Davis.
Perhaps it sounds a TINY bit like him. No?
All y'all bitches can shut your pie-holes or I'll right hook you on Interstate!
Are we still talking about yours truly?
Are we still talking about yours truly?
Like you'd ever repeat yourself, Davis.
The reason Matt is acting bizarre in his posts lately is becuase(wait for it)he is gay.
Maybe just a LITTLE bit gay?
Go away Mr. Tusks. You are irrelevant.
SO tired of the bleating from Matt Davis, a chap who admits he doesn't even know what a "420" is.
http://blogtown.portlandmercury.com/2007/06/overheard_in_the_mercury_offic_2.php
None of you are real!!! Wait... I think remember what to do to end all this insanity. Let me see if i can remember it...
Through dangers untold, and hardships unnumbered, I fought my way here to the castle, beyond the Goblin City, to take back the child (Matt) that you have stolen. For my will is as strong as yours, and my kingdom is as great...you have no power over me
You have no power over me.
Wait, that wasn't me!
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Those comments look delicious.