Blogtown, PDX

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

News Driver Sought By Vigilantes in Alleged Hummer/Bicyclist Assault

Posted by Matt Davis on Tue, Jan 22 at 4:14 PM

HUMMER: Eats your bike for breakfast…

This email just landed in the Mercury’s inbox, and in the name of responsible bike/hummer community healing, I’ve decided to post it. Fightfightfight!

Your help is requested in information that helps locate/arrest/prosecute/neuter/vivisect the driver of a new/newer Hummer H2, royal blue, (All-terrain blue, in Hummer speak) who assaulted a cyclist at 23rd and NW Pettygrove last night.

Yesterday afternoon (4:30ish) a cyclist was run off the street, assualted, threatened with a softball bat and punched in the face by the driver of a brand-new royal blue Hummer H2. Police were notified by several calls from about a dozen shocked passers by. The driver took off. The truck had no plates. If you see a new royal blue H2 with no plates and a 5’8”-5’9”, balding man in his mid-late 30s driving it, that’d be him. Call it in as the driver that assualted the cyclist at 23rd and Pettygrove last night. If you have information regarding this assault, please contact the Portland police at 503-823-3333.

Don’t vivisect or neuter anybody on my account, please. And remember that these are allegations, not facts. But threatening someone with a softball bat? Jeepers. What did they do?

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Comments

allegations, matt?

not in my book.

if you have multiple witnesses that saw the assault and immediately called 911 at the same time.. i think we're a little past 'innocent until proven guilty'.

Posted by lyle | January 22, 2008 4:51 PM

Yes lyle. And you were ever reasonable when it came to such matters.

Posted by Matt Davis | January 22, 2008 4:54 PM

http://www.elcovaforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=32195
Scroll down a bit and check out DennisAJC's avatar. That's yr guy.

Posted by martin | January 22, 2008 5:15 PM

Great---clicked on a link on that page you gave Martin and saw half a body after a car accident.

Posted by Hula | January 22, 2008 5:30 PM

Can I vivisect him on my own account?

Posted by Tommy | January 23, 2008 2:33 AM

Can I vivisect him on my own account?

Posted by Tommy | January 23, 2008 2:33 AM

That Hummer Forum is remarkable.

"It's hard to keep a 6'4", 280lb rock-bustin guy like me out of it."

Just give me stats on your cock, mate. Why not?

Posted by Matt Davis | January 23, 2008 8:42 AM

HOLY FUCK!...

From: H2Bill, Hummer Veteran...

'Smart' cars have been around for years in Europe. I saw lots of them in Paris in 1999. They remind me of my response to retards that compare my H2 to the Prius: "Be sure and mention at your kids funeral about the fuel economy you got before your head on collision with the drunk driver".

Funny how that usually ends the conversation.

Posted by PR Walters | January 23, 2008 4:19 PM

Where's the rest of the story? How do we know the cyclist didn't deserve an ass beating? There's a lot of cyclists out there who don't follow the rules of the road. He probably fucked with the wrong person this time.

Posted by Eric | January 23, 2008 8:51 PM

What calendar day was yesterday? I still see this post making the rounds on myspace as of right now.

Posted by Bjorn | January 25, 2008 6:22 PM

What calendar day was yesterday? I still see this post making the rounds on myspace as of right now.

P.S. Is there any proof? A link to an online police blotter or anything? It's almost starting to feel like some chain email.

Posted by Bjorn | January 25, 2008 6:23 PM

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