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Wednesday, January 30, 2008

News Good Morning, News!

Posted by Wm. Steven Humphrey on Wed, Jan 30 at 9:21 AM

Democrat John Edwards has dropped out of the race for the presidency—and suddenly? He’s Barack and Hillary’s BEST FRIEND IN THE WORLD.

Oh, and Giuliani is quitting, too, in case anyone cares—which we don’t.

Ralph Nader is launching an exploratory committee to decide whether or not he’ll run for president AGAIN in ‘08. Oh, for the love of sweet Jesus—somebody stop him!!

A 10-year-old boy in Pennsylvania was confined to a dog cage after he admitted he had been poisoning his family with lamp oil and household cleaner. You are never allowed to complain about your family again.

Angelina Jolie plans to sell the news of her pregnancy to the tabloids for charity. Why doesn’t she just sell the kid for charity and cut out the middleman?

angelina_jolie.jpg

Comments

Angelina Jolie is hot. She's so hot, she still makes me say "she's hot" every time I see a picture of her. I pity Brad Pitt. She must be eating him alive.

Nader! Nader!

Woohoo!

Nader, huh? Wonder how much the Republicans paid him to run this time.

Have you seen Nader lately? Dude looks like Death eating crackers on the side of the road! He might be dead by November.

"OH NO! whatever you do, don't vote for the scary, scary independent!!!" quoth the people whose candidate prattle on about "change" and all that shit while also voting for the war, the patriot act, etc. get real, fools. mainstream america will do whatever it can to maintain the status quo-- enough of this retarded demonizing. if everyone stopped treating true progressive candidates as whacko nutjobs, maybe we could have enough power to elect something better than the lesser of two evils?

I agree, but would it kill them to send a candidate that doesn't seem like such a whacko nut-job? Yeah, I know, Americans are way too superficial when it comes to some really important stuff... but it would help the cause.

Maybe someone like Amy Goodman...

Or Angelina...

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