So Movieweb started bragging that they had a picture oh-so-secret monster from the eagerly anticipated, oh-so-mysterious Cloverfield. Or, more accurately, a picture of a toy of the monster. Wait—wasn’t this thing was a bad guy on the Ninja Turtles cartoon?

“OH, MY EYES,” you scream! “Why no spoiler alert?” ‘Cause it’s since been debunked by the occasionally correct “sources” at AICN, that’s why. Which is good. Because that thing’s kind of lame, and if I waded through months of ominous trailers and sneaky viral marketing just to have that thing jump out at me in the theater, I’d be kind of pissed. In fact, it might even remind me of something else that seems really similar. And no one wants to think about that. Man, I’m getting angry just… goddammit. Fucking Ferris Bueller bullshit was what that was.

More Cloverfield-centric news: Sounds like a teaser for J.J. Abrams’ Star Trek reboot will be attached to the film when it opens in a few weeks, which makes perfect sense: If there’s one thing Trekkies love more than Star Trek, it’s sci-fi monster flicks. If you’re planning on seeing Cloverfield opening weekend, it’s probably best to prepare for some major nerding out.