Blogtown, PDX

Thursday, February 21, 2008

News Good Morning, News!

Posted by Wm. Steven Humphrey on Thu, Feb 21 at 7:01 AM

•McCain has strongly denied doing the chicka-chicka-wow-wow with a female lobbyist. Ooh-wee, John is stone cold pimpin’!

• Remember that dying spy satellite filled with toxic fuel that was endangering the earth? WELL, WE BLEW THE SHIT OUT OF IT. Yeeee-HAW!

• Obama has won the global Democrats Abroad primary giving him 11 wins in a row. Said the German delegates: “Jah! Jah! Obama ist gut!” (Sorry, I just think German accents are endlessly funny.)

• Hillary’s grand scheme to steal Texas away from Obama just had a Texas-sized hole blown into it.

• Another bicycle vs. car run-in last night in SE Portland. Happily the cyclist only suffered minor injuries. We don’t know how the driver is doing because he/she fled the scene.

• Pauly “the Weez” Shore is suing Nightmare on Elm Street director Wes Craven—which is just so awesome in any number of ways.

You better believe you are, buddy. Especially if Craven breaks out his “finger-knives glove.” (What DO you call that thing anyway?)

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Comments

i heard mccain not only had an affair with that lobbyist, but they had a baby... and they aborted the baby AFTER it was born.
and then they showed its body speeches from osama bin laden and michael moore.

and that they then wrapped it in a rainbow colored flag before burying it.

Posted by lyle | February 21, 2008 8:00 AM

oh, and they hired an illegal immigrant to dig its grave.

Posted by lyle | February 21, 2008 8:02 AM

Lyle:
oh, and they hired an illegal immigrant to dig its grave

And then they used a tactical nuke on him.

Posted by Samuel John Klein | February 21, 2008 10:51 AM

WSH:
Pauly “the Weez” Shore is suing Nightmare on Elm Street director Wes Craven—which is just so awesome in any number of ways

Here are just a few:

• Pauly Shore and Wes Craven were neighbors? Who knew?

• They got someone to call Pauly Shore a comedian. Gotcha!

• Think of this as kind of like The Happening only the victims are two people who really kind of deserve it.