Hey, who likes that really hot chick from Death Proof?

Okay. Maybe I should be a bit more specific.

From The Hollywood Reporter, via AICN:

Mary Elizabeth Winstead is in negotiations to star opposite Michael Cera in Universal’s Scott Pilgrim vs. the World. Edgar Wright is directing the adventure romance.

In Pilgrim, Winstead will play the dream woman of a young slacker (Cera). But the only way he can win her heart is by battling and defeating her seven evil ex-boyfriends.

Scott Pilgrim is a fantastic book. (Read our interview with creator Bryan Lee O’Malley here!) Edgar Wright is a great director. (Read our interview with him here!) And if you ask me, Mary Elizabeth Winstead—who was perfect in Death Proof, and wasn’t half bad in that last Die Hard—is an excellent fit for Ramona Flowers, the roller-blading delivery girl of Scott Pilgrim’s dreams. (We do not have an interview with her!)

Read a free preview of Scott Pilgrim by downloading Comic Book Viewer and then going to the website of Oni Press.

Jonathan Maus at BikePortland.org put up a side-by-side comparison of Sam Adams and Sho Dozono on bike issues, after he’d had a chance to sit down with Dozono to ask him how bike friendly he’d be as mayor, and how he’d show leadership on the issue (as transportation commissioner, Adams has already had tons of play on BikePortland). Maus doesn’t make an endorsement; Instead, he puts the info out there to inform voters, and he asks his readers for their thoughts.

The interview is astounding. Dozono, for starters, tells the city’s premier bike publication—hello, it’s called BikePortland—that there are more important things than riding a bike. While this may technically be true—and pandering in the opposite direction is just as pathetic—it’s a terribly dismissive statement.

Another excerpt:

I asked for one concrete thing he would do but he steered his answer to a subject knows well — tourism. Dozono said he knows how to make a city attractive to international visitors [like Amsterdam is known for bicycling for instance].

He mentioned how bike-friendly China is and how all the train stations there are full of bikes. I interjected that now, many Chinese are moving away from riding bikes and that to keep them riding would take bold leadership — much like Adams has shown — in order to withstand the car companies moving into the market.

When I mentioned Adams, Dozono was quick to remind me that Portland’s commitment to bicycling was started long before he Adams took office, saying that other leaders like Tom McCall and Earl Blumenauer “get a lot of credit”.

Dozono then gave himself credit for leading some junket that thought about “how do we really market Oregon as a bike-friendly destination.” (Nevermind the people who live and bike here every day, apparently.)

And the comments—25 so far—spell big trouble for Dozono. Except for the occasional “he’s a nice guy, but…” there’s not a single positive thing said about Dozono.

This one dissecting the “Sho Get It. Sho Gets It Done.” slogan is my favorite:

The part “Sho gets it,” is intended to mean that Show understands big business’ frustration with Sam’s willingness to represent the will of the people, rather than just the people with the money, and to do creative things that enhance the uniqueness and safety of Portland for everyone. Sho, if elected, will reverse that and ensure that business interests get what they want - an opportunity to make more profit at the expense of the public good.

The part “Sho gets it done” is purely ironic. It’s a reference to the fact that he has never, ever accomplished a single thing in public service. Also, in his chosen field, Sho has succeeded chiefly in defrauding children, bankrupting his businesses, and, of course, tax delinquency to make a political point. He can’t tout any of those things, so he refers simply to “it.”

Great slogan, huh?

Also… Ultra PDX, a fashion/design/culture blog, just put up a post with similar sentiments. Saying “we’re going to talk politics because this is an emergency,” Ultra urges a vote for Adams.

We’re about to elect a new mayor. This is simple, electing Sam Adams will ensure a strong voice for arts and culture funding as well as a continued commitment to expanding the creative capacity of our beloved Portland. The alternative is the candidate endorsed by Potter, Sho Dozono, who has no stated arts and culture policy. It’s not even mentioned on his website. Yikes.

If you haven’t cast your ballot, please do it. If you have time to help elect Adams, now is the time.

If you’re a hippie, you’ve no doubt heard about the Greener Homes and Gardens Expo that’s happening this weekend at the Expo Center: It’s a “community-inspired event focused on renewable remodeling, do-it-yourself home and garden projects, and alternative energy/fuels.” In other words, it sounds like it’ll be an awesome event for anyone who still insists on voting for Nader, or who engages in utterly unacceptable public behavior.

But what you might not have heard about via your soy ink-printed longhair newsletter is the “Alternative Ride & Drive-In Theater,” one of Greener Homes and Gardens’ events, in which dirtfeet can “get behind the wheel of electric, hybrid, and biofuel vehicles while watching a series of environmentally friendly films.” The good part? Some of the movies aren’t half bad, with the schedule including films like The Real Dirt on Farmer John, King Corn, and The Future of Food. Full details and a schedule can be found right here.

Fine, I admit it. I’m the TV guy, and I never, ever watch Oprah. So can someone PLEASE explain to me why these women are going crazy—no. Not just crazy, they’re are going fucking batshit crazy when Oprah says the words “favorite things.” SERIOUSLY! I have not seen this kind of reaction since I announced it was “Free Corndog Day” at the Mercury!

Please help, Oprah lovers! Why are these women going so ba-zonkers?

Are you the sort of person who likes movies? Are you the sort of person who likes free movies? Well, here you go: Here at the Mercury offices (605 NE 21st, Suite 200), passes for early screenings of the funny-looking The Foot Fist Way and the not-so-funny-looking You Don’t Mess with the Zohan are yours for the taking! And they’re totally free of charge… provided that you give Brad Buckers, the Mercury’s cheerful office receptionist, a hug.

The Foot Fist Way
Screens Thurs June 5
7 pm, Bridgeport Village (7329 SW Bridgeport)

You Don’t Mess with the Zohan
Screens Thurs March 5
7 pm, Century Eastport (4040 SE 82nd)

So, my post regarding increased protests against venues that serve foie gras has been generating some interesting comments:

personally I choose not to frequent restaurants that serve it. i see it more and more and get really bummed out. I suppose it would be more effective if I told the restaurant why i won’t be returning…

Posted by m | May 14, 2008 2:35 PM

After a careful examination of the facts and my own ethics, I support foie gras personally. I will make it a practice to make sure the restaurants I frequent know it. I didn’t know the movement was mobilizing in portland. I feel restaurateurs should know there are other voices in their community. Though I would never personally stoop to the level of interfering or harrassing a business (such as the fur or pro-life protests).

Posted by C | May 14, 2008 3:06 PM

i’m a vegetarian who doesn’t like chichi restaurants, so i’ve kind of ignored this issue until today. a little googling says that the ducks or geese are force-fed a human equivalent of 60 pounds of food a day for several weeks until their internal organs are on the verge of failure.

i don’t understand eating meat in general, but this is especially cruel. i will not go to blue hour even more than usual in protest.

Posted by passive boycotter | May 14, 2008 5:06 PM

I plan on covering the Blue Hour protest tonight. Action kicks off at 7pm. So, what about you? Will you be trying to get foie gras off the menu, or eating it?

Every week, you’ll find a Mercury placard on the front of our boxes advertising a story in the current issue. And while we’ve had popular placards in the past, none have been as popular as this one:

According to our circulation manager, Jay, almost every one of these popular placards have already mysteriously disappeared from our boxes. BUT IS IT REALLY SUCH A MYSTERY? I believe that this particular placard is already a hot collectible because it depicts a watershed moment in our state’s political history. Therefore proud Oregonians are obviously grabbing this placard for themselves, and framing it on their walls at home to share with their grandchildren and their grandchildren’s grandchildren.

But even though many of our boxes stand naked, there’s still time for YOU to get this historic collectible for your very own! Simply send five dollars to “HILLARY GETS HER ASS HANDED TO HER IN OREGON” c/o Wm. Steven Humphrey, Portland Mercury, 605 NE 21st Ave., Portland, 97232.

Act now and you’ll also receive, absolutely free, the highly collectible Mercury placard that pictures Urkel saying “Got any Cheeeeeeese?”

SO GET YOUR HILLARY PLACARD TODAY! Supplies are limited, and there probably won’t be any left when Hillary concedes (which should be in about four days).

Look, I love cats. I do. I have two of my own and I think they are amazing creatures. I talk to them, take pictures of them, cuddle with them. Oooh, sorry, that was starting to sound creepy. But no matter how creepy I get with my cats, I will never get as creepy as this:

Dancing with a tail of his own, Fred becomes a psychic extension of the cat. ‘I share its grace, power and oneness with the universe. I relate to Fluff and the whole spectrum of feline physicality on a profound level. I even regard birds differently.’”

Yes, this is from an actual book called Dancing With Cats.

I implore my friends and colleagues: If I ever get so bad off that I am stripping down, donning a cat tail g-string and dancing with my cat, take me to the vet and have them put me down. Or just send me to a nice farm out in the country…

The Decemberists are playing a free show this Sunday at The Bowl at Waterfront Park.

They’ll be opening up for some guy I’ve never heard of who is from Chicago (I bet he knows Jim O’Rourke or Albini) and probably on a major label or something. The show is free, but you should RSVP in advance right here.

Well, hey, free Decemberists show and a chance to see the next leader of the free world. And by that I mean Colin Meloy, of course. Who else would it be?

End Hits: Which local band should open for McCain?

• Have you seen the trailer from Joss Whedon’s new fall show Dollhouse, yet? Here it is, starring Faith, that lady from Rushmore, and Helo from BSG. Ooh, and the bad guy from Serenity.

• According to the WSJ, if ratings don’t pick up for the CW, it could mean SCHHHTTKKT! (That’s the sound of someone cutting it’s throat.)

• If you loved last night’s season finale of The Office, then check out Paul “Toby” Lieberstein’s post show live blogging.

• American Idol producers have some ideas that are intended to make the show suck marginally less.

• Jonah Hill to star in 21 Jump Street… the movie??

• Here’s another longer clip from Dollhouse. (Hey, look! Helo holds his gun just like he does in BSG!)

• A missing Croatian woman has been found 42 years after her death—sitting in front of her TV. Hey, if I die, you guys know where to find me, right?

This is a true story.

Last Saturday evening, a friend and I were walking through Old Town, when a gentleman passed us by. He was carrying a jar of peanut butter and merrily eating the contents with his fingers.

Then, he grew visibly distressed. “A spoon!” he shouted as he hurried into the night. “I need a spoon!”

You see, the poor fellow had extracted as much as he could with just his bare hands, but had reached the point where he couldn’t access any of the remaining peanut butter. I instantly thought of him as I discovered this:

This is the “Easy PB&J Jar,” which allows you to easily scrape out every last lick of peanut butter without leaving any behind in the nooks and crannies. Both ends unscrew, and the walls are straight, so nary a nugget of peanuty delight will be uneaten. It can also be used for almond butter, cashew butter… any kind of butter you can think of! No longer will you need to smash open your butter jar just to get at that last bit of hard-earned sticky goodness.

(The only thing, though, is… okay, so you transfer your peanut butter into this Easy PB&J Jar for easy access. But in doing so, how do you avoid leaving behind lots of precious PB in your original jar? Or am I overthinking this?)

Thanks to Neatorama.

Apparently this adorable house cat didn’t get the Mercury’s memo that today is Casual Cat Friday. He was too busy hanging out with his ne’er-do-well friend, the World’s Angriest Cat.

The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian wasn’t screened in time for our press deadline, possibly because it’s pretty lousy. Here’s our web-exclusive review—or if you’re that lazy, here’s the short version:

With nearly an hour of tacked-on battles, sword fights, and overly long journeys, Prince Caspian is bloated and lacking in all sorts of magic that it purports to have. In shooting for Lord of the Rings-scale epic scope, Narnia just comes off as the Shire’s unsophisticated backwoods cousin—desperate to please, and without a clue how to do so. COURTNEY FERGUSON

Full review here.

The only thing more exciting than voting—which you better do soon… today’s the last day to mail ballots!—is partying with the candidates on Election Night.

The folks at the Oregon League of Conservation Voters have posted a map of all the area election night parties (color coded with their endorsements, not ours). It’s pretty damn handy.

View Larger Map

You can also tune in to Blogtown on Tuesday evening: We’ll be bringing you live, drunken action from most of the parties in town.

There is a difference between slovenly and casual. Unfortunately, my cat Fido has not realized that. Below is a picture I took of him after confiscating his cold can of Miller in punishment for his bad language.

What the #@$!% do you mean by “you’ve let yourself go,” bitch!

I’m the first person to admit that you can almost never judge a film’s quality by its trailer. Usually, previews are made by people who have absolutely nothing to do with the film itself—PR-savvy ad people who cut and stretch only the most marketable and simple elements of a film into a two-minute burst that’ll hopefully put asses in the seats on opening weekend. Judging a two-hour feature on the strength of its two-minute trailer is the equivalent of deciding if you like Spank Rock’s album YoYoYoYoYo based purely off of your impressions of, say, a salad dressing commercial.

Still, and all that said… it’s kind of perversely impressive how you can put Jet Li, Michelle Yeoh, Maria Bello, and the ABOMINABLE FUCKING SNOWMAN in a trailer and still have it come out looking like shit.

Thanks for nothing, Brendan Fraser. Also, I am STILL WAITING for Encino Man 2.

Okay, this is likely to be the FUNNIEST thing you’ll see all day! The crafty minds over at Barely Political put together this “what if” scenario which shows what Bill O’Reilly’s producer must have been saying during Bill’s classic Inside Edition freakout. This is a goodie!

Copwatch is challenging new IPR director Mary-Beth Baptista to show the community she is capable of objectively investigating police misconduct, having worked closely alongside the police as a District Attorney over recent years.

We’re hoping to interview Baptista about her ambitions for the office as soon as she takes up the job. It’s worth noting that Baptista’s reputation for fairness and objectivity is pretty strong, as far as District Attorneys go, and that Copwatch’s concerns could be misplaced.

Copwatch activist Dan Handelman says: “Ms. Baptista is going to have to work hard to convince the community that she is not biased toward the police after working for so long side by side with police to prosecute crime.”

Handelman points out that so far as Copwatch knows, no Portland Police officer has been prosecuted for on-duty use of force by the DA’s office, even though there have been prosecutions for lying, stealing and cheating, and sexual misconduct.

“It is particularly important for Ms. Baptista to show a serious commitment to community concerns in the wake of two police shootings this week,” Handelman continues. “And the action taken by police against people protesting laws that target the poor and homeless at City Hall.”

Preset your car stereos—and your boombox bikes—to 91.1 FM, because come next year, Portland is getting a new radio station. And not just another typical radio station, we’re talking a local music friendly, and commercial-free, station.

Jeff Simmons, of the web-based Portland Radio Authority, looks forward to hearing local music on the FM dial. “Portland has one of the strongest independent music communities in the country. We have an international reputation for our music, but you wouldn’t know it listening to FM radio in Portland. 91.1 will give access to this vibrant cultural asset, and will open outsiders’ ears to the amazing things happening in Portland.”

A lot of details need to be sorted out, but you can read the full press release after the jump.

In the meantime, I am perfecting my wacky morning zoo routine. Watch your backs, Playhouse.

End Hits: “Rock-a-doodle-doo, you’re listening to Bill and Marty!”

METROEAST COMMUNITY MEDIA AND COALITION OF COMMUNITY GROUPS ACQUIRE
RADIO LICENSE

GRESHAM, Ore., May 16, 2008-MetroEast Community Media, in
collaboration with a coalition of community groups, received word
this week that its application for a non-commercial educational (NCE)
radio station has been approved by the Federal Communications
Commission. With its transmitter located on Mt. Hood, the signal of
the new station - 91.1 on the FM dial - will reach most of the East
Metro area as well as much of Portland east of the Willamette.

The license was granted as part of a rare opening of non-commercial
radio licenses available to non-profit organizations. The
coalition has been working for more than a year to acquire the
construction permit. According to Common Frequency representative
Todd Urick "This is a once in a generation opportunity. This may
well be the last time we have a window like this where community
organizations can get a full power non-commercial FM radio license."
Common Frequency assists non-profits in acquiring NCE radio licenses.

As a non-commercial station, 91.1 will run no advertising and will
be supported by its listeners and underwriting.

While decisions about the new station's format are still being made,
Bruce Fife, President of Musicians Local 99, said, "We're hopeful
that Portland's diverse and vibrant local music scene will be
well-represented on this new station. It's long past time for these
talented musicians to share valuable space on the air waves."

Jeff Simmons, of the web-based Portland Radio Authority, looks
forward to hearing local music on the FM dial. "Portland has one of
the strongest independent music communities in the country. We have
an international reputation for our music, but you wouldn't know it
listening to FM radio in Portland. 91.1 will give access to this
vibrant cultural asset, and will open outsiders' ears to the amazing
things happening in Portland."

Rob Brading, CEO of MetroEast said, "We're thrilled to have acquired
this license on behalf of the community. Other than our founding,
this license is probably the most important event in MetroEast's
25-year history. We're very excited with the opportunity to offer
radio with an east side emphasis and to give voice to the vibrant
local music scene."

Brading expects the station to go on the air sometime in
2009. "Next year is MetroEast's 25th anniversary. What better way
to celebrate than by going on the air with this new station?"

(I’ve been hanging on to this one since Tuesday.)

Now I finally have a way to decode those dorky emoticons.

Hey fans of late ’90s Russian teenage lesbians! Remember t.A.T.u., and their controversial video, “All the Things She Said”? Well, the teeny twosome is now all growed up, still recording, and STILL doing very naughty things. When your boss isn’t looking, check out this NSFW new video entitled “Beliy Plaschik (White Robe)”—which like their previous work relies on hot dance beats, a dark undercurrent, and this time? Bunches of nudity! (Aaaaand something about a pregnant execution. Enjoy!)

Thanks, James!

It’s hot. And it’s going to get hotter. Welcome, summer!

Barack Obama’s coming to town this Sunday, for an outdoor rally on the waterfront. And Hillary Clinton’s going to do something on local TV (snooze!).

Take that, FCC! The Senate voted to reverse the FCC ruling allowing media companies to own both a newspaper and a TV station in the same market.

President Bush asks Saudis to pump out more oil to help curb rising gas prices—oil is currently $127 a barrel—and Saudis say no. (I have to say, I agree with the Saudis on this one.)

Ellen DeGeneres announced on her talk show and she and girlfriend Portia de Rossi would be tying the knot, in light of yesterday’s California Supreme Court ruling legalizing same-sex marriage.

Say goodbye to Vice Presidential Candidate John Edwards. He’s not interested.

My friend the Gastronaut is throwing a party on Sunday for the National Marrow Donor Program.

Live music! Beer! Helping sick kids!

At the event, he’ll be registering people to become bone marrow donors—which, as best I understood from the explanation I drunkenly received a few nights ago, basically means you just give a couple cell swabs from the inside of your cheek, fill out some forms, they file your info away, and then if some kid is dying of leukemia and you happen to be a genetic match, you get a phone call. Apparently donating bone marrow is not actually horribly painful, nor does it involve having incredibly large needles jammed into your spinal cord, and….:

Every year, at least 30,000 adult and children are diagnosed with leukemia, neutropenia, aplastic anemia or other fatal blood diseases. Only 30% of patients in need of a marrow or blood cell transplant find a matched donor in their family. The other 70% may turn to the National Marrow Donor Program to search for an unrelated donor. Genetic matches outside of the family are literally a one in a million chance; when you become a Donor Volunteer, you may become someone’s winning lottery ticket, and save a life!

I think there’s gonna be a silent auction, as well as live music from Red Ray Frazier, Invisible Rockets, Blue Horns, Henry Dark, and Jesse Young and Friends. And did I mention helping sick kids, and beer?

Green Dragon Pub and Bistro, 928 SE 9th, Sunday May 18, 3 pm-11 pm or so

It’s a miracle! Andrew R. Tonry beat the bubonic plague he was fighting last week. That means he’s back to deliver a brand new episode of Easier Than Reading, the musical podcast that gives you a sneak peak at the live music happening around town this week. On today’s show, Mr. Tonry spins tracks from the Dizzee Rascal (pictured), Libretto, Langhorne Slim, Tu Fawning, Lykke Li, and Clinic. Get it here.

From the Obama campaign:

SUNDAY, MAY 18
Portland, OR

RALLY WITH BARACK OBAMA
The Bowl
Waterfront Park
Corner of Southwest Columbia and Southwest Naito
South of the Hawthorne Bridge

Doors Open: 12:30PM

The event is free and open to the public. Tickets are not required, but an RSVP is strongly encouraged. To RSVP please visit www.barackobama.com.

***For security reasons, do not bring bags. Please limit personal belongings. No signs or banners permitted.***

See you there.

Street Roots director Israel Bayer has some wise words on the homeless protest:

Like it or not, many individuals experiencing homelessness are not going to sleep in a shelter, period. There are also people living with animals; couples, and families that simply will not be split up due to archaic shelter guidelines. And yes, there are drug addicts. Individuals dealing with an addiction are human beings, and using law enforcement to force individuals into the criminal justice system, and not have the same access to shelters as the broader population, is inhumane, costly, and backwards…

We are all on the same side in this fight — local businesses, community organizations, City Hall, advocates, social services, and the people affected the most. It’s clear that there are not enough resources. But we can’t lose our focus on being able to couple short-term, out-of-the-box thinking with a housing first model that has proven successful. We can’t be distracted into thinking shelter beds are a satisfactory means to end the criminalization of the homeless or to house people. Portland’s leaders need to reinforce long-term solutions to truly make a difference.

Incidentally I was in the gym this morning, and heard a customer talking to his personal trainer about the homeless protest. The trainer, I think, was on the side of the protesters, but the guy on the abs-ball was saying, “I’m about as conservative as it gets on this issue…the city’s giving these people places to sleep, it’s not their right to get in my way, walking down the sidewalk.”

And I could just see the trainer wanting to slap him one, or kick the ball over so this guy would fall on his ass. But he couldn’t, because he was being paid to listen to this guy’s crap. I wanted to go over and say pretty much what Israel said in his post, about shelters not being the right solution for everyone, and ask him what gave him the right to say where people should be allowed to exist. But I stopped myself, because I realized it’s better that people are talking about these issues in the gym and at least having to decide where they stand, than not talking about them at all. Also, I was worried I might punch the guy, and that wouldn’t get any of us anywhere.

Don’t punch anyone. It’s not a good idea.

Not only have we given you a food issue with practical information on eating cheap, we are giving our Blogtown readers info on FREE FOOD. Check it!

TODAY! All Dunkin’ Donuts locations are giving away free iced coffee. I can’t vouche for the quality, but if you need your Thursday afternoon coffee fix, get thee to a Dunkin’.

Also Today!McD’s is giving away their chicken biscuit sandwiches. Never had ‘em, but I might now, because I’m broke! And no matter what he might tell you, you do not have to give Ronald a hummer to get one.

Sund(ae)y! Wal-Mart is giving away free ice cream sundaes with your preferred toppings at the Supercenter nearest you. Bet you’re pissed that there’s not one in your neighborhood now!

But I have saved the best for last. After three days of coffee, corporate biscuit sammy’s and Republican ice cream, you may want some quality food stuffs. Prepare yourself:

Monday! Escape From New York Pizza on NW 23rd is giving away a free slice and a small soda to all who enter their door!

No need to thank us Blogtowners, we give you this information because we love you.

Check out this wonderful and magical site in which the artist gets pictures drawn by kids, and then recreates the drawings in photographs using real people and objects. Wow, that’s hard to explain! Just check it out. First the original kid’s drawing, and then the recreated photo.

More examples after the jump!

Many more on the original site!

I just want to remind everyone that we are in the market for an arts intern (that sounds creepy, doesn’t it? Well, so do the noises I hear coming from the newsroom sometimes). We need someone from approx June-August who can commit 15-20 hours a week to help us with all the things we need help with. (See this post for more details.) So, if you know any English majors who think the world owes them a living, send ‘em our way and we’ll beat the notion out of them.

Email resumes, clips, enthusiasm, and cute cat YouTubes to ahallett@portlandmercury.com

And then there is, of course, this.

1986’s Transformers: The Movie plays tonight at the Clinton St. Theater (2522 SE Clinton), 7 and 9 pm, $6.

Is MTV interested in Portland?

Word on the street is that the fine quality network that has gifted our culture with A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila and The Hills has been filming local bands for something on Portland music.

What is it for? A sexy reality show? Probably not. Are they going to put them all in a house and roll cameras as the msucians stop being nice and start being real? I doubt it. Perhaps, it is for a brief MTV news feature of local bands? Yeah, that’s probably more like it.

The network that made Tabitha Soren the household name she is today, so far has filmed YACHT at Studio B in Brooklyn, and rumor has it, Au as well. Here is what YACHT’s Jona Bechtolt had to say about the whole thing, “They shot it while we were in New York and they didn’t seem 100% sure if they were even going to Portland. It was very weird. We lied A LOT.”

More news on this once we find out more.

**Update** The filming is for a Portland “scene report” (here is their Brooklyn one, with lots of coverage of former Portlander Todd P) set to air sometime soon.

In some thrilling news, the California Supreme Court has ruled that laws denying gays and lesbians the right to marry are unconstitutional. Here’s the story, cancel your trip to Massachusetts, and pick out a wedding dress, lovers!

In a monumental victory for the gay rights movement, the California Supreme Court overturned a voter-approved ban on gay marriage Thursday in a ruling that would allow same-sex couples in the nation’s biggest state to tie the knot.

Domestic partnerships are not a good enough substitute for marriage, the justices ruled 4-3 in striking down the ban.

Outside the courthouse, gay marriage supporters cried and cheered as the news spread.

“This is a very historic day. This is just such freedom for us,” Rizzo said. “This is a message that says all of us are entitled to human dignity.”

From the cops:

Early this morning the Police Bureau closed the sidewalk around City Hall for cleaning. All individuals were removed and the sidewalk will remain closed until Safe and Clean completes the cleaning. Once the sidewalk reopens, individuals will once again be allowed to walk or protest on the sidewalk in front of at City Hall. Police will enforce all applicable laws related to camping and sleeping on the sidewalk.

No one was arrested during the sidewalk closing. However, one person was arrested about a half hour later. The man, 20-year-old Andrew Newman, was arrested for Interfering with a Police Officer after he refused repeated commands to get out of the street.

Discuss.

If there’s one thing that Bret and Jermaine (of the hilarious band and HBO show Flight of the Conchords) know, it’s how to please the ladies. Check out this new video entitled “Somethin’ Special (For All the Ladies in the World),” where they share the secret of seducing women. (Hint: It involves roller skates!)

And don’t forget that Flight of the Conchords will be appearing at this year’s Sasquatch fest! WOOT!

Scott McCollister, the cop who shot and killed Kendra James in May 2003, was involved in the fatal shooting of 27-year-old Jason Spoor in NE Portland on Tuesday night.

McCollister was suspended for six months following the incident, but ultimately got his job back following an arbitrator’s decision.

“One wonders what has been going through McCollister’s mind in this past few weeks on the fifth anniversary of a day that changed his life, got him suspended off the force for 6 months (but reinstated with back pay by an arbitrator) and ended an unarmed young woman’s life,” says Dan Handelman of Portland Copwatch. From the cops:

HOMICIDE SUSPECT KILLED IN OFFICER-INVOLVED SHOOTING

Portland Police Homicide Detectives and members of the Multnomah County Major Crimes Team are continuing the investigation of a homicide and subsequent officer-involved shooting which occurred on May 13, 2008.

As officers were investigating a possible homicide in the 9100 Block of NE Glisan, officers were confronted with 27-year-old Jason Spoor, who was armed with a weapon. During the confrontation, two officers discharged their weapons. The officers are identified as 45-year-old Timothy Bacon, a 14-year veteran of the Police Bureau currently assigned to Southeast Precinct, and 32-year-old Officer Scott McCollister, a 7-year veteran, currently assigned to East Precinct.

The Medical Examiner conducted an autopsy today and determined that Spoor was killed by a single gunshot to the head.

After the shooting and a fire was extinguished at the residence, officers located an adult male homicide victim inside. He will not be identified at this time, and an autopsy scheduled for tomorrow will confirm his cause of death, however, it appears he was shot. Jason Spoor has been identified as the suspect in connection with this homicide.

All known witnesses to the officer-involved shooting have been interviewed. Interviews with the shooting officers are expected to occur in the next 48 hours.

Another week, another Mercury music section to ball up and throw at the giant beetles that will destroy us all.

A whole lotta love for my favorite Swede (sorry expressionist painter Isaac Hirsche Grünewald, you’re now number two, buddy) Lykke Li.
MP3:
Lykke Li - Little Bit

The Kills sing the white man’s blues. And for the last time, no, I am not talking about Crossroads here. Although remember when Ralph Macchio beat the Devil’s guitar player (Steve Vai!) in a shred-off? That ruled.
MP3:
The Kills - Tape Song

With a brand new EP on wax (their CD is coming later), Tu Fawning would like the comparisons to TuffAwning (Tucson’s Leader in Residential Awnings and Canopies) to stop right now.
MP3:
Tu Fawning - I’m Gone

The fertile procreators in the Golden Bears are ready to take over the kids music market with their next record. Watch yer back, Raffi.
MP3:
The Golden Bears - Tall Ships

El-P will rip off your skin and make it into a cape. Okay, just kidding, the dude doesn’t wear capes.
MP3:
El-P - Fuck the Law

I’m not saying that the music of the Black Hollies goes better with a handful of psychedelic drugs, but I am saying that the music of the Black Hollies goes better with a handful of psychedelic drugs. Wait, did that come out wrong?
MP3:
The Black Hollies- Paisley Pattern Ground

Photo: Andreas Öhlund

End Hits: Alive with pleasure!

• Former candidate John Edwards endorses Barack Obama, and it’s already paying off… in fat… juicy… delegates (he said while rubbing his hands and licking his lips).

• And as the election reaches its climax, the nation’s eyes turn to US!

• Meanwhile, John McCain promises to win the war in Iraq, pull out the troops, kill bin Laden and break every one of these promises… all in one term!

• Here’s your morning “throw-up” story: The embryonic twin of a 9-year-old girl is found… in the girl’s stomach! RETCH!!

• Syesha Mercado is voted off American Idol leaving genuinely nice rocker David Cook and pussy Mormon David Archuleta to battle it out. Guess who I’m rooting for?

• And finally, our own Tonya Harding appeared on the Today Show this morning, publicizing her new book, The Tonya Tapes. And guess what? SHE THINKS WE’VE GOT HER ALL WRONG. Here’s the interview!

They aren’t even ashamed about it: The first thing that plays when you start up any of the three DVDs from this new Indiana Jones box set is a trailer for Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. It’s a pretty blatant reminder that this DVD set, which came out on Tuesday, exists for two reasons: First, to cash in on the fact that there’s a new Indy movie coming out, and second, to make sure everyone goes to see the aforementioned new Indy movie. Part cash-in and part promo, the box set would still be a solid-enough buy for Indy fans—or it would be, that is, if a superior box set didn’t come out in 2003, and was still available online. (Which it is.) When compared, the new box set’s pretty crappy when compared to 2003’s box set.

All the same, I’d be very surprised if a ton of people don’t pick up this set anyway—so if you’re thinking about doing so, you should at least know what you’re getting (and not getting) for your money. Details on the new box set are after the jump.

It’s not that this new box set--dubbed “The Adventure Collection” is bad, really, so much as it’s just kinda superfluous. All three films are included on these three discs, along with a few special features on each disc.

Raiders, like each of the films, boasts a new “introduction,” which is basically a short doc with Steven Spielberg, George Lucas, et al. talking about how Raiders came about. This disc also boasts a featurette on how special effects technicians achieved that infamous face-melting effect for the film's climax, as well as “The Indy Trilogy: A Crystal Clear Appreciation” (ugh, that title), in which the cast members of Crystal Skull look back on Raiders. Not surprisingly, this feature feels pretty flimsy and bland and publicist-approved, with no real insights or new realizations. (Then again, if you're desperate to hear Shia LaBeouf talk about how he and his dad watched Raiders back in the day, well, here you go.)

Temple of Doom is the most interesting of these discs, if only because it’s interesting to watch Spielberg and Lucas dodge around in this film’s introduction--basically, Spielberg spends all his time trying not to come right out and say that he doesn’t like Temple of Doom very much (he never explicitly says as much, but it's pretty evident he doesn't--and might not have even liked it while he was making it), and he also implies that everything that's wrong with Doom is Lucas’ fault. Lucas, meanwhile, defends this film's darkness, but grudgingly admits that he likes the other Indy films more. (He also drops the interesting reminder that the villains of the film, the Thuggee cult, were previously used in George Stevens’ 1939 flick Gunga Din.) There’s also a featurette on the various creepy animals featured in the trilogy, and a featurette that looks at all the different locations the trilogy shot in. (A few trivia bits here are interesting: That Temple of Doom’s tone was influenced by The Empire Strikes Back, and that the same submarine used in Raiders was the one from Das Boot.)

Last Crusade boasts another introductory/reminiscing featurette, plus selected clips from an American Film Institute panel that featured the female stars of the trilogy (that Nazi chick from Crusade bears a serious grudge against Sean Connery, for dubious reasons), and a featurette on Indy’s enemies and sidekicks. Crusade's disc has a few interesting trivia tidbits, too, most notably Spielberg talking about how the casting of Sean Connery made perfect sense, as Indiana Jones was inspired by James Bond, and Lucas crediting Crusade's success to the fact that it’s “essentially a character piece with some action in it."

In addition, each of the discs contains storyboards from the film (which play alongside the relevant sections of the films), galleries of production stills, concept art, props, and marketing elements, and--if you’ve got a PC--a demo for the Lego Indiana Jones: The Original Adventures videogame. (That PC only business is LAME, but I’m mostly just saying that because I have an Xbox and not a PC, and I really want to play this Lego Indiana Jones business.)

All of the short documentaries here are put together by longtime Lucasfilm and Spielberg historian Laurent Bouzereau, and they’re perfectly fine, but just… meh. Most of the interesting info and trivia that's in these discs I've mentioned above (you're welcome!), and a lot of the other content feels like filler. (That is, with the exception of the galleries, which are interesting: From the production artwork to the production stills, there’s some cool stuff here that hasn’t been made available before.)

Honestly, picking up this set would be a fine decision, and money well spent, if the 2003 box set wasn’t still available for pretty much the same price. This new version reuses those films' transfers and recycles that set’s DVD menus, but doesn’t really add anything that interesting. Most importantly, 2003's set included an excellent, two-hour-long documentary on the making of all three films, which provided a far more in-depth and nuanced look at the trilogy. This set's fine, I guess, if you're not interested in tracking down the 2003 set, or don't really care about special features--but if you're looking to get your money's worth, the 2003 box set is where it's at. This one feels at best like a rehash and at worst like an extended, $35 ad for Crystal Skull.

Fun times! Not only is the Sex and the City movie coming out (which I am going to assume is totally awesome until I see proof otherwise), there’s going to be a themed fashion show on May 22nd in anticipation of the film opening here, featuring designs from Emily Katz, Sofada, and more, plus a runway-walk contest and specialty cocktails. The catch? The event starts at 7 pm, and is a private event until 10. And if you don’t get an invite, tickets are $20 in advance. Oh well. Check out the deets here.

More fashion this way.

The most startling and profound moment of last night’s Ralph Nader rally at Benson High didn’t come from the candidate. It wasn’t his entrance or his words. At the time, he was sitting down.

It was the people who did it.

After delivering a rambling speech, Nader took a break before a Q&A session. A lawyer friend of his, Greg Kafoury, took to the stage to solicit campaign contributions. He asked the audience if anyone in the audience could contribute $2,300, the max allowable.

An uneasy hush fell over the crowd.

Kafoury kept at it. Was there anyone here who could do it? He pounded it. It felt sad, an indicator of Nader's sinking relevance in the popular political community. "You can put it on your credit card," Kafoury beckoned. No takers. He ratcheted the amount down to $1,000 and all of a sudden someone stood up.

"$1,000!" he shouted.

Then there was another. And another. Three of them ponied up, saving face for the withering, crusader who had managed to fill about half the seats in the large high school auditorium.

One of the $1,000-givers looked quite young--early 30's at best. He was wearing a green hoodie that read "Ireland". He didn't appear flush with dough. I looked at him with awe. It was inspiring.

The rounds continued at lower denominations. A handful of $500 donations. Many more at $250 and $100. In these terms, the night must have been a success.

The financial edification of Nader's efforts were especially surprising after the tepid speech he had just delivered. It ping-ponged for some 40-odd minutes (maybe more?) like an bouncy ball jumping from topic to topic (only less exciting).

In the span of 30 seconds Nader tossed off mentions of Bristol Myers Squibb, Bush impeachment, asbestos, and the amount of money an executive makes during a 15-minute trip to the bathroom. These obtuse, jagged free-associations burst forth constantly during the speech, which had no real flow. Nader swerved back and forth, failing to group like-concerns into some more cohesive narrative. It was all just out there. BOOM! Like a pinata full of gripes exploding over the audience.

Most of his concerns are right on the money, mind you, but had Nader been trying to reach a broader audience--rather than preaching to the choirs--the casual observer would've been left in the dust of Nader's figure-8.

But therein lies the post on Nader's windy walk that he kept returning to: You've got to be involved. You've got to sacrifice, and learn and work. Civic responsibility, while demanding, is a must.

"Shame on us," he said. "Shame on us for not showing up to defend this country," from those in the White House, and of course, the corporations. With his elbows resting on the podium, a head too heavy slumping from his wispy frame, Nader banged on the corporations over and over again.

The message, of course, is not new. Nor is Nader's viability. But that's not really the point--Ralph is here to remind us what democracy and freedom and liberty really are, explaining that the real meanings of which have been obfuscated by media, corporations and major political parties. He repeated his mantra, a quote from Eugene Debbs, a number of times: "Freedom is participation in power." He added, "It's not about voting for the least-worst."

Nader's candidacy isn't about viability--he is too disheveled in tone, delivery and message to be the proper vessel. The picture he paints, although optimistic at heart, sometimes reads overtly bleak, as if the only brush were a red pen. It's a laundry list of reprehensible acts, all which, he believes, can be fixed with regulation. At times it almost sounds fearsome--some bureaucratic nightmare a la Terry Gilliam's Brazil.

But really, what Nader is asking for is a fair discussion, to be allowed onto the ballots and into the debates. Despite all the baggage he's carrying, Nader is a relentless warrior for whom giving up is not an option. "I'm not a quitter," he told me in a recent interview.

And while the media coverage has mostly dried up--there were no local TV News outlets at the event--Nader will continue, buoyed by a frighteningly shrinking contingent of supporters. Among them though, passions run deep, as evidenced by those stood up that night at Benson and said "Yes, I'll give." They will provide the contrast, praying that the message is heard, and rallying against those who would stomp it out. Another one stands up. "Yes, I'll give."

---

No local TV media showed up, but this guy did! You know him, right? Public Access pro-weed show! Fuck yeah man!

In lieu of the awesome, elaborate cat post I was going to put up today, instead I want to tell you about this:

Cute, right?

Here are some of the selling points, as listed on the BD medical supplies website:

- Plays “SpongeBob SquarePants Theme” at the end of temperature taking
- Oral, underarm or rectal use
- Bite-resistant shield

Oh neat, so it’s bite-resis… wait, wha-HUH? What was that middle one?

Rectal use, you say? And it plays the theme song after gently violating you?

Sign me up!

Thanks to Cartoon Brew.

Following its meeting behind closed doors last month, five members of the Independent Police Review’s Citizen’s Review Committee invited the Mercury to attend their meeting this afternoon to discuss appropriate changes to the oversight group. From left to right, they are: JoAnn Jackson, Michael Bigham (the chair), Debbie Aiona (Who is NOT A CRC member, but with the League of Women Voters), Loren Eriksson and Mark Johnson. It was a small room, so I had to take two pictures:


The aim of today’s meeting was to identify “big ticket items” to discuss at next Tuesday’s nine-member group meeting, looking at a draft list of changes written by City Auditor Gary Blackmer.

Surprisingly, Auditor Blackmer has suggested hiring another full time investigator to the IPR, with the power to undertake independent investigations, separate from the cops’ Internal Affairs Division, when complaints are made against high-ranking officers, or “when such a heightened level of independence is required for public confidence.”

“I never thought something typed by Auditor Blackmer would say that,” said Copwatch Activist Dan Handelman, after the meeting. “It’s a significant step forward.”

New CRC member Mark Johnson said he wanted changes made to the way allegations are formulated against officers from complaints. Last month, for example, the CRC upheld and added a debriefing to complaints against officer Kevin Wolf, alleging he had used excessive force, and not identified himself as a police officer, after he pointed a gun at a contractor who was working on the house next to his at 11pm in Silverton.

“But there was no consideration or investigation of whether the circumstances were such that he should have reported for duty,” said Johnson, referring to Police Bureau Directive 311.30. “It seemed like at some point along the line he’d think that maybe instead of his badge and gun he should have used his cell phone and dialed 9-11.”

Johnson added: “If the allegations are being formulated in such a way to protect an officer from a specific allegation that would leave a blemish on their record, that’s a very serious problem.”

The CRC members seemed excited by the hiring last week of a new IPR director, Mary Beth Baptista. Former IPR director Leslie Stevens quit to take a job with the police bureau in January.

“Under the new director, we might see a different picture,” said Jackson. “It’s the coziness of the previous director to the police.”

Jackson added that “We need some early input and conversations with this individual. I’m looking forward to having someone who’s a little more balanced.”

In addition, the group seemed disappointed by Blackmer’s refusal to appoint a staffer to support the CRC—a change suggested by consultant Eileen Luna-Firebaugh in her January report on the group. Also, Blackmer is asking the CRC to come up with its own training plan, even though Luna-Firebaugh already suggested several ideas in her report. Blackmer is also suggesting an annual work session between the CRC, IPR and city council, and the hiring of a consultant to look at ways the IPR can do better outreach into the community. The IPR’s last outreach coordinator, Laurie Stewart, resigned from the group at the end of last year.

Rover and Fido, leaders of the Gay Cat Wednesday Rebellion say: “You cannot stop our lifestyle with your fancy canned air!”

From the NYT blog

GRAND RAPIDS, Mich. — John Edwards, the former senator from North Carolina who bowed out of the presidential race in January, is expected to endorse Senator Barack Obama at a rally being held here tonight.

Officials announced the news shortly after Mr. Obama landed here late this afternoon. The campaign has timed the announcement to coincide with the start of the major evening newscasts, which would have otherwise focused on Senator Hillary Clinton’s landslide victory in West Virginia, which raised new questions about Mr. Obama’s strength with white working class voters.

Mr. Obama’s campaign is hoping it will be a big step toward the party’s coalescing around Mr. Obama as the Democratic nominee.

The endorsement ended months of speculation over Mr. Edwards’s preference in the Democratic nominating contest, during which he mostly stayed silent and close to home in Chapel Hill with his wife, Elizabeth.

More here

Here’s the trailer for the new Woody Allen flick Vicky Christina Barcelona which looks like a real snoozer… until of course you reach the 1:11 mark and see Scarlett Johansson grabbing a taste of Penelope Cruz’s tonsils! (Hopefully, Allen will inform us at what point during his film this scene occurs, so I can pay my $9, watch the scene, masturbate, and leave.)

As foie gras has gained ground in the Portland food scene (it’s nearly impossible to find a well regarded restaurant not serving it these days), I’ve often wondered at the absence of the hard core animal rights protesters. I remember a few years back when protesters set up shop in front of Higgins, essentially forcing foie gras from the menu. In an interview with the Seattle Times in 2004, owner Greg Higgins had this to say about the protests:

“Even though I would never condone cruelty to animals, I resisted because they were so hostile. I wanted to talk about it. It was only when I tuned them out and internalized the issue that I was able to come to a rational decision.”

Since then, however, the protests seem to have lost their aggressiveness. But that appears to be changing.

Today, news has reached me that protesters from the Portland Animal Defense League (PDX ADL) plan a “phone jam” this Friday to tie up the lines at Blue Hour in protest of that restaurants participation in the foie gras scene. The idea seems to be to disrupt lunch and dinner service reservations, generally slowing things down in the restaurant. Currently, Blue Hour offers a preparation of sautéed duck foie gras with a lemon/licorice compote and huckleberry sauce.

Chef Kenny Giambalvo of Blue Hour, talked to me about his foie gras sourced from Artisan Foie Gras in Sonoma California.

“I visited in 2004,” Chef Kenny told me, “It’s a pretty interesting operation.” He observed the feeding process wherein the last 14 days of the ducks life are spent in a pen where a machine finishes the feeding process, fattening the liver.

Although Chef Kenny has been confronted by protesters “constantly, throughout the year,” he does not seem to be bothered by them. “It’s fine,” he says “As long as they let the costumers come and go, they can do whatever they want in a public space,” adding that protesters, “help me make the right decisions as a business owner.”

At the moment, that decision seems to be to keep foie gras on the menu.

This, however, is not the case for the Pearl district French bistro, Fenouil and its neighbor Ten 01. Both removed their foie gras after being hit by ADL protesters on April 19th.

More on their decision after the jump

Courtney Kintz, spokesperson from Portland Animal Defense League, says that the ADL has been working on the anti-foie campaign for a couple of months, “There hasn’t been any direct action against foie gras for awhile,” she said, noting that the ADL “took up the cause” after noticing an increase in Portland restaurants serving the French delicacy. The ADL has created a kind of hit list which includes new, big name eateries like Beast.

Sources from Fenouil refused to speak on the matter but did confirm that foie gras had been removed from the menu. Adam Berger, owner of Ten 01 and Tabla also confirmed that foie had been removed from the Ten 01 menu in response to protests, mostly to avoid the annoyance of the direct action. Though Berger, personally, is not a fan of foie gras, he noted that customers at Ten 01 have requested its return. “Our customers want it back,” he said, “a lot more than want it gone.”

Asked if this could be the opening act to the demise of foie gras in Portland, Berger replied, “Quite possibly, if Portland follows other cities that are banning foie gras.”

Chicago is one of the few major cities in the US to ban foie gras. However, the ban was repealed today 36-7, in a very controversial, end-run vote in city council.

No matter how you look at it, the foie gras issue in Portland is one that offers insight into the city’s foodie soul. It’s hard to say which way things will go. Will the cities gourmets cling to their fattened liver, or will a collective guilty conscious make foie gras a culinary foot note?

Until that question is answered, Courtney Kintz promises more direct action, “We’re always willing to stand outside with signs,” she says, “And you will be seeing more of that.”

The Oregon Ironman competition was this weekend at the Chinook Winds Casino.

My roommate went, ‘cause her GF’s sister was competing (and won!). Afterward there was a pizza party for all the participants, which my roommate described as “a room full of huge orange people who hadn’t eaten anything but chicken and oatmeal in months shoveling pizza into their mouths,” which is a delightful mental image.

For some delightful image images, hit the jump. Thanks to Kelly and Misti for the photos.

“I think everyone’s preference is to have all four members agree on a budget,” Mayor Tom Potter said, kicking off a conversation about the budget. Ultimately it was a low-key discussion, other than a short aside between Potter and Commissioner Randy Leonard about the differences between ongoing and one-time funding (with Potter seeing one-time funding as an affront because it could evaporate the next year, and Leonard pointing out that the council has to reapprove all funding, ongoing and otherwise, every year). The council heard testimony from two dozen people, and went over a few line items—areas where Potter disagrees with Leonard and Commissioner Sam Adams, who’ve put together their own budget revisions. In the end, they didn’t adopt a budget; They’ll keep discussing it for a few weeks, and Commissioner Dan Saltzman has his eye on trying to craft a compromise.

The real action happened outside. I got a call reporting that things were about to escalate with the protest, so I ran downstairs. There were a handful of cops, who had honed in on one man who was asleep under a blue tarp. He didn’t respond to vigorous rubs on his chest, so the cops called paramedics. As media and other protesters gathered around, the paramedics came and took the largely unresponsive man away. While he was being loaded into the ambulance, protesters asked the cops if they were going to confiscate his belongings; No, they said, and let the protesters move in to gather up his things. With that, the cops left.

Protesters said they believe the cops had shown up to enforce city ordinances, but the medical issue took precedence—and when it drew attention, they believe the cops abandoned their ‘sweep’ plans for the moment.

Anybody lose a cat? I found this on the internet and am trying to help him find his home:

p.s. I know this is fake, but come on. That picture is too funny.

Ladies and gentlemen, here is my early nomination for the “Summer Jam of ‘08”— N.E.R.D.’s homage to chicks snorting booger sugar, “Everyone Nose.” Not only does Pharrell and the boys put together a great chorus, but the video features sexy gals blasted out of their gourds on blow, AND a cameo from… LINDSAY LOHAN? I’m sure she’s just there to chastise these girls for their reprobate behavior. Right, LiLo?

Anyhoo, watch the video and let us know in the comments below… WILL YOU BUMP IT? OR WILL YOU DUMP IT?

All the girls standing in the line for the END HITS!

There’s a new Portland Tribune-KPTV poll on the various city races.

Though the numbers strangely differ between the two media outlets, here’s what they say:

According to the Tribune, the race for council seat 2 has Nick Fish with 35 percent, Jim Middaugh with 10 percent, and 46 percent undecided. KPTV reports that Fish has 28 percent, and 56 percent are undecided. In other words, it’s anyone’s race at this point, with less than a week before ballots are due.

In the mayor’s race, Sam Adams is at 41 percent, with Sho Dozono at 26, says the Tribune. KPTV says it’s 40-25, with 27 percent undecided.

There aren’t numbers for the six-way race for council seat #1.

At every council meeting, Mayor Potter asks if anyone in the audience would like “to pull any items from the consent agenda,” the part of the budget the council passes without discussion. Usually, the crowd is silent. Today, a guy in the front row, in a red polo shirt, said he did want to pull an item. Potter asked him which one. He started reading off the numbers of all of the consent agenda items: “608, 609, 610…”

Potter cut him off, and asked him to leave. A security guard approached him, and reiterated Potter’s request. The man refused, and a few others in the audience backed him up—they appeared to be folks related to the protest outside—asking what he’d done wrong. Potter—and Leonard—said he was disrupting council.

The council went ahead and approved the consent agenda, without pulling any of the items.

“This place gives me the creeps,” one protester said, as he got up and walked out. The security guards are hovering over the guy in the red polo. I believe they’re waiting for the police. The man is dialing a number on his cell phone. Council is carrying on.

And we haven’t even gotten to the budget drama yet!

Our beloved feline—Michael Jackson, a robust little “tortie” whose hobbies include killing birds and breaking hearts—has a terrible habit of walking all over our kitchen counter. Since we don’t want litter paws on the cutting board, we’ve tried all sorts of methods to curb her behavior; the spray bottle, tin foil, violent beatings stern lectures, but nothing seems to work. So it’s time to bring out the big (air) guns: SSCAT™!

SSCAT™ has two elements: a motion detector and an aerosol can. It will detect the cat’s motion and will release a spray. Once this is repeated a few times, the SSSCAT will keep the cat away from unwanted areas.

Oh, yes. If you doubt its cat-blasting awesomeness, YouTube has plenty of hilarious clips of the SSCAT™ in action.