In lieu of the awesome, elaborate cat post I was going to put up today, instead I want to tell you about this:

Cute, right?

Here are some of the selling points, as listed on the BD medical supplies website:

- Plays “SpongeBob SquarePants Theme” at the end of temperature taking
- Oral, underarm or rectal use
- Bite-resistant shield

Rectal use, you say? And it plays the theme song after gently violating you?

Sign me up!

Thanks to Cartoon Brew.