Shortie is cool because he was later in Goonies, thus making him forgivably cute in Temple of Doom. Plus my last name is Jones and always love to hear DOCTA JONES!
You’ve gotta hear Capshaw out because she tongues Indiana fucking Jones. Christ, the rest of us want to, we need pointers for what kind of shit flies.
Most importantly, Temple of Doom’s suckiness made The Last Crusade even more awesome. OMG, IT RULES. Doesn’t The Last Crusade just fucking SERVE YOU?
I declare myself the winner because now I’m totally going to watch Last Crusade when I’m hungover tomorrow.
Does "Indiana Jones and The Temple Of Doom" only count as one word?
IJATTOD is the greatest serialized movie never broken into serial parts. Like some serial adventure of the 1930s, the movie needs to be seen in about ten separate parts with lots of cliffhangers. Watched in that manner with a generous helping of gin it turns out to be the most awesome serial ever made. Let's examine it's constituent parts:
*Shanghai gangsters.
*Himalayan plane plunge.
*Crazy colonial sub-continental monkey brain feasts.
*Secret passages with traps.
*The Thugee cult.
*Pulling a dude's heart right out barehanded.
*The invention of the PG-13 rating.
The result of the above? Pure awesomeness.
My friends and I spent our recesses recreating scenes in kindergarten. One afternoon my platonic best friend joined in. I kissed her, inspiring another kid to spit Capri Sun on us like the elephant.
Sure, "very funny" but I never saw her again after school stopped for summer break. I assume her religious parents stuck her in a private school. Maybe not because of the kiss but I wonder.
Nonetheless, I love TOD, even though it tore my heart out of my prepubescent chest and tossed me into a pit of guilt. If I dig it, you should too.
"Temple of Doom" is great because:
(1) How could you not like a teen-oriented action movie that opens--apropos of absolutely nothing--with a Busby Berkeley musical number, featuring tap-dancing girls in blond wigs? In these post-Tarantino days, that sort of post-modern genre mixing has become old hat, but when "Temple of Doom" came out it was a pleasant shock.
(2) The mining car chase sequence is awesome. "Temple of Doom" was the first movie since Buster Keaton's "The General" to figure out how to make a chase on rails suspenseful and visually interesting.
(3) Chilled monkey brains for dessert!
Indiana Jones movies are so cool and so provocative, I actually cheated on my now ex-husband while watching the Temple of Doom!
Impressive all around, but Indiana Short Term Loans' heartbreaking story of lost love clinched it. Congrats!
The magical potato!
The magical hot potato!!!
That is all.