Blogtown, PDX

Friday, June 20, 2008

Sports Free Tix to Tonight’s Sportfight XXIII

Posted by Wm. Steven Humphrey on Fri, Jun 20 at 11:21 AM

Now here’s something fun for a Friday night—Blogtown is giving away THREE tickets each to TWO lucky people for tonight’s Sportfight XXIII at the Rose Garden (courtesy of Global Spectrum). If you’re into mixed martial arts or just enjoy the thrill of two guys beating the holy hell out of each other, you’re gonna want to go for this. AND THEY’RE GREAT SEATS, TOO, IN THE 100 SECTION.

Here’s a description of tonight’s main event:

Main Event: Welterweight Championship
Welterweight Michael Pierce, SportFight Champion (7-0), Braveheart MMA/Gresham, OR vs. Nathan Coy (4-0), Team Quest/Portland, OR

At SportFight 21, Michael Pierce used his superior grappling skills to frustrate champion Ed Nuno and take the welterweight belt. But his time around he’ll have to defend his title against another top-notch wrestler in Nathan Coy, who was an All-American at Oregon State. Coy has also shown he can let his fists do the talking, winning his last two fights via knockout and submission (strikes). In addition to the welterweight championship, both pride and team bragging rights will be on the line for these two fighters, who used to train together at Team Quest before Pierce moved on to Braveheart MMA.

Read more about tonight’s bouts HERE! Want the tickets? In the comments below answer the following question and LOG ON WITH YOUR REAL EMAIL ADDRESS: “If there’s no way you would get arrested, what would you like to do to Humpy’s face?”

Cut-off time is 3 pm today, I’ll alert the winners via email, and you gotta pick up your tickets here at the Mercury office by 5 pm! GOOD LUCK!

“Not the face! NOT THE FACE!”

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Comments

Well obviously, I'd cut off his nose to spite it.

Posted by Le-oh! | June 20, 2008 11:49 AM

Maybe Stick it on the seat post of Rosy O'Donnell's bike.

Posted by Greg | June 20, 2008 11:49 AM

A little rouge and some eyeliner

Posted by FeloniousMoz | June 20, 2008 11:51 AM

I think that the best thing to do with Humpy's face would be to make some sort of puppet-style contraption and then get a ventriloquest to get it to sing:

The Humpy Dance is your chance to do the hump
Do the Humpy Hump, come on and do the Humpy Hump
Do the Humpy Hump, just watch me do the Humpy Hump
Do ya know what I'm doin', doin' the Humpy Hump
Do the Humpy Hump, do the Humpy Hump

Black people, do the Humpy Hump, do the Humpy Hump
White people, do the Humpy Hump, do the Humpy Hump
Puerto Ricans, do the Humpy Hump, just keep on doin' the hump
Samoans, do the Humpy Hump, do the Humpy Hump

Posted by Graham | June 20, 2008 12:03 PM

I'd make a bronze of it in the same state it was in for his x-mas cover shoot with Chocolate Santa.

Posted by Monkeybeat | June 20, 2008 12:57 PM

I would use it as an insertion point for gavage - through which I would force feed him nearly fatal amounts of corn mash for roughly two weeks to fatten his liver for human foie gras (I don't eat the duck or goose kind, it's so.... inhumane) and of course, I'd enjoy it with some fava beans, and a nice Chianti.

Posted by jeff | June 20, 2008 1:09 PM

I would wear his face like a mask while I do my kooky-dance

Posted by DeepCerulean | June 20, 2008 1:22 PM

No, no, no. You don't do anything to the face. The face is perfect as is.

What I'd do is drag him down to my basement, and brake his leg. Then, I'd give him a cane and a snazzy jacket, and force him to be a full time House impersonator.

Every night, I'd stumble down the stairs, faking a new illness. Humpy would have to diagnose the illness, while making with the wit.

Anything less entertaining then last season's realityshow arc, and Humpy would get the hose.

Humpy does not want to see the hose.

Posted by Kyle | June 20, 2008 2:27 PM

Congratulations to GRAHAM and KYLE for winning three tickets each to tonight's Sportsfight event! Check your email, guys, for info on how to pick them up by 5 pm today!
Have fun tonight, and don't forget your blood lust!

Posted by Wm. Steven Humphrey | June 20, 2008 3:04 PM

Oh… and while the contest may be over, feel free to keep describing what you'd like to do to my face.

Posted by Wm. Steven Humphrey | June 20, 2008 3:21 PM