This Week in the Mercury
Thursday, June 26, 2008
Sports Blazers 2008 - Live from the Rose Garden
Posted by Ezra Ace Caraeff on Thu, Jun 26, 2008 at 4:01 PM
Live from the Rose Garden as the Portland Trail Blazers are preparing for an eventful draft night. If the last few years have taught us anything, it's that the Blazers don't go quietly on draft night.
Not sure where the belle of the ball—GM Kevin Pritchard—is tonight, but it's far far far away from here. You ever see Lawnmower Man? Well that is where Pritchard is right now. He is in a weird digital space, chillaxing with Max Headroom, and avoiding scrubs like myself tugging on his dockers and asking him his thoughts on Kevin Love's jumper.
His jumper sucks and he will be the bust of the draft. But enough on the Beach Boy's nephew, more draft live-blogging after the jump...
Food Very Berry
Posted by Ned Lannamann on Thu, Jun 26, 2008 at 3:38 PM
Like berries? Want to get some RIGHT NOW? Head on over to the Ecotrust Farmer's Market for the Red, White and Blueberry Bash that's taking place in Ecotrust's parking lot. RIGHT NOW. And if you spend $5 from any vendor, you get a free berry shortcake. We all know how great seasonal fruit is, and how good the local food taste--and it's berry season. RIGHT NOW. So go get some, and eat some. RIGHT NOW.... or very, very soon.
Maybe had too many berries.
Ecotrust Farmers Market, NW 10th, between Irving & Johnson, 3:30-7:30 pm. Hey, that's RIGHT NOW!
Politics
The City's CRC Dog and Pony Show Work Session
Posted by Amy J. Ruiz on Thu, Jun 26, 2008 at 3:33 PM
This is truly adorable. The entire city council is holding a work session this afternoon, on the Columbia River Crossing project.
This, despite the fact that they already sent a letter to the CRC outlining what they want in a new I-5 bridge, and this despite the fact that the momentum around a 12-lane sprawl-enabling bridge for Vancouver commuters seems unstoppable. Meanwhile, no one on the Portland City Council is speaking up to demand that any new bridge set a 21st century standard for cleaner air, a significant reduction in CO2 emissions, and a reduction in vehicle miles traveled.
Instead, we have a council draft resolution with some watered down recommendations, like "the CRC project should contribute to a reduction of vehicle miles traveled (VMT) per capita in the bi-state metropolitan area." Ooo, tough condition guys. How about demanding VMT on the bridge itself is reduced by 30 percent? Or taking a huge step back and asking whether this project is really a $4.2 billion priority for the region? Why not add transit and make minor safety improvements, then spend a few billion more equitably throughout the region on transportation choices?
Sorry, this project makes my blood boil. And watching my elected officials essentially sit there as the train speeds out of the station is infuriating.
To their credit, Commissioners Randy Leonard and Sam Adams and Mayor Tom Potter are drilling project staffer Tom Markgraf on details of the city's authority on the project. Letters signed by both governors say the cities of Vancouver and Portland are advisory, but the city wants more direct oversight. So what's the deal, Leonard asked?
"To finally send the project through to the federal government, everybody has to agree to it," says Tom Markgraf of the CRC staff. Ten minutes later, the council doesn't quite believe it.
"The word that struck me was 'advising,'" says Potter.
"The problem is that projects that are this big have a momentum of their own," says Adams. "And we want to make sure we have a good handle on it," so it doesn't get away from us.
More after the cut.
News Man Stuck in Electrified Crane on Burnside
Posted by The Unpaid Intern on Thu, Jun 26, 2008 at 3:13 PM
“There’s a lot happening at 28th and Burnside” the chic website of Sunrose Condominiums smoothly announces. Right now, that tagline is horrifyingly true -- the condo site is the scene of a life and death situation as a construction crane operator hangs 60 feet above Burnside, stuck inside a giant electrified crane. According to officer Richard Terry, at 2pm the crane’s hook swiped a “very high voltage” power line across the street, immediately knocking out power to 40 blocks on the Eastside and possibly electrocuting the unknown operator.
The operator's stuck in this little box:
Hook stuck in the line:
Now a crowd of watches from under the awning of the corner Starbucks, sipping iced coffee while the stuck operator waits. Terry said the rescue team saw him move. “He is conscious, but we don’t know the extent of his injuries,” Terry said. The team can’t get to the operator right away because it’s possible the entire crane is still electrified. Once the engineers shut off all the electricity coming into the transmission line, the rescuers can scale the crane and hopefully remove the man. The operation might be touch and go because, in Terry’s memory, the rescue team has never dealt with a crane this big running into an electrical line.
UPDATE: The guy survived! According to an officer at the scene, the rescue team went up the crane, talked to the operator for a while and then he was able to climb down without any help. Miracle of miracles!
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Cats Cat Love
Posted by Unpaid Arts Intern on Thu, Jun 26, 2008 at 3:06 PM
So I've recently been accused of being a pervert for...to be honest I'm not sure. Anyway, I'm guessing it would be wise to steer clear of anything that might be misconstrued as promoting an unnatural love between beast and man. But whatever. This is too stupid and hilarious not to share.
Film Tom Waits on the Roof
Posted by Ezra Ace Caraeff on Thu, Jun 26, 2008 at 2:28 PM
Well, Tom Waits won't be literally on the roof (he'd drunkenly fall off), but his 1988 concert film, Big Time, will be. It's part of the NW Film Center's "Top Down"series (far classier than my personal "Tops Off" film series), in which six different movies are projected on "the panoramic parking rooftop at the deluxe Hotel deLuxe."
But it's not just all rooftop movies, each screening (the full schedule is below after the jump) will feature a live local act as well. Love Menu will be opening for Big Time, which in my book, totally counts as opening for Waits. The series starts on the 24th of July and runs until late August.
Film DVD Contest: "Win" The Mummy DVDs.
Posted by Erik Henriksen on Thu, Jun 26, 2008 at 2:15 PM
So sometimes DVDs come to me in the mail. If I think they're halfway interesting to anybody else, I'll usually review them on Blogtown (tomorrow: reviews of the new Futurama DVD and the 11th volume of The Journal of Short Film). If they look particularly terrible, I'll throw it onto Ezra's desk and insist that he watch it. (Enjoy Toxic, asshole!) And sometimes, if no one gives a shit about them except for me, I'll take them home, where they pile up on my already too-big stack of DVDs that nobody else gives a shit about. (Director's cut of Jet Li's Fearless, anyone? Anyone?)
Today, though, we got two DVDs I don't know what the fuck to do with: The Mummy and The Mummy Returns, both of 'em two-disc, "deluxe editions," featuring entirely too many special features--you know, just in case you want to go into fantastically minute detail about just how shitty a director Stephen Sommers is. As if that's not lousy enough, these DVDs also boast digital copies of each film, so you can keep The Mummy Returns on your iPod forever, secure in the knowledge that, whenever the mood strikes, you can watch classic scenes like this:
Damn. Here's where I was going to put a video of some crappy Mummy scene, but all I could find on YouTube were creepy fan videos. Who the fuck loves The Mummy enough to make something like this?
I guess I answered my own question. Congrats, BlackCat18Bdg.
ANYWAY. I DO NOT WANT THESE DVDS ON MY DESK. So: Contest! Whoever can post a link to the absolute worst Mummy-related fan video on YouTube will "win" these DVDs. The contest ends either at 5 pm on Monday or whenever I can't take watching them anymore, at which point I will likely throw my computer off the Mercury's roof.
In related news, Brendan Fraser is a dick.
Food Foie Gras Protests to Hit Alberta Street Oyster Bar
Posted by Patrick Coleman on Thu, Jun 26, 2008 at 1:44 PM
Based on a press release we received at the Mercury today, it looks like the Portland Animal Defense League (PDXADL) will be moving their protests to Alberta Street. Their next target is Alberta Street Oyster Bar.
As I reported in the Mercury a few months back, PDXADL has thus far been able to remove foie from the menus of two Pearl Disctrict eateries: Ten 01 and Fenouil. Since then, they have continued to be a presence outside of Blue Hour, where foie remains firmly ensconced on the menu.
Protesters may get a much more friendly reception on Alberta Street, which is home to In Defense of Animals and a number of vegan restaurants.
PDXADL will have a press conference in front of Alberta Street Oyster Bar today at five pm to talk about their views on foie gras and to announce their demand to make Portland a "Foie Gras Free Zone."
Fashion Sneak Attack: RYZ
Posted by Marjorie Skinner on Thu, Jun 26, 2008 at 1:24 PM
Fast on the heels of END, yet another line of shoes is launching in Portland, helmed by yet another high ranking alumnus of a local looming sneaker monolith: former president of Adidas America and Adidas Japan, Rob Lansgstaff's new baby is RYZ (END's co-founder, Andrew Estey, was global director of footwear design at Nike). Its concept is one that attempts to harness the power of popular vote to determine its product designs. The company has developed a template (a basic canvas high top) that anyone can design embellishing graphics for, and then submit it to the RYZ community, where it will be voted on—the winning design will then go into production, and the winning designer will see a $1-per-pair-sold profit share. Plus of course all the fame and glory relative to the winner of an American Idol contest, except not on TV, and with sneakers, of course. But you get the idea.
Tonight is the launch of the line, and five local designers are finalists to become the very first winning designer. One of them is Jason Ehlers, who has demonstrated some (perhaps) less wearable shoe creativity in the recent past, and less recently made headlines as "Caveman," a distinction for which he paid a rather heavy price. Sight unseen, my vote's probably going to go for his design, but I'll be there tonight to check out the other contenders. Stop by the gallery event and vote for your own favorite tonight from 6:30 pm on (the winner will be announced at 9 pm) at souk (322 NW 6th, Ste 200). Hang out and sample goodies from Mt Hood Beverage and Simpatica, but then move along, friends. The space has a limited capacity, and the more votes that can get in, the more democratic the results will be.
PS: Do you want fashion to be democratically elected?
Need help getting dressed? Spending money? Consult MOD!
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Portland Plaque Attack!
Posted by The Unpaid Intern on Thu, Jun 26, 2008 at 11:37 AM
Red alert from the city water bureau! Someone's been swiping the historic plaques adhered to the wells in Columbia South Shore Well Field. The recent disappearance of several plaques points to a coordinated, vicious effort by anti-history individuals, most likely The Youth.
And, as the bureau's alert says:
It's rather annoying that people feel inclined to steal them and then do so. We can only presume what they are doing with them. (I'm guessing they're not hanging them over their beds to look at every night...) But it's illegal and just rude.
So far, leads are slim. This situation is reminiscent of similarly dark times in the lengthy annals of Portland Public thievery. The Sacagawea head incident of aught eight and recent the life-size bronze lion heist being the most raw.
The Columbia South Shore Well fields were built back in 1984 after "floods, landslides and high turbidity underscored the vulnerability of a single unfiltered water source." Who knew the wells dug to protect citizens' water supply would some day need to be protected from that citizenry itself?
The Water Bureau Security staff is awaiting your calls 24/7: 503-823-6084
posted by Sarah Mirk
TV Cookies Make Her HAAAAAAA-PPY!
Posted by Wm.™ Steven Humphrey on Thu, Jun 26, 2008 at 11:32 AM
As reported here last week, the Cookie Monster no longer exclusively eats cookies, which is of course, bullshit. However! There's a new "cookie monster" in town, named Kathreya who appears on the British version of Big Brother. (Let it be known that the American Big Brother is a tub of crap compared to the Brit's version.) Anyway, Kathreya REALLY, REALLY LOVES COOKIES. As you will see from this clip.
Think that was amazing? Check out Kathreya in the "Diary Room." SHE'S THE GREATEST!
Music This Week's Mercury Music Section
Posted by Ezra Ace Caraeff on Thu, Jun 26, 2008 at 9:39 AM
Another week, another Mercury music section to read while you ponder the case of the mysterious bones of Multnomah Falls.
See that Constantines photo up there? Now see that clown dressed in green who is just standing there bored, arms crossed, while the rest of the crowd is losing their shit ? I hate that guy soooo much right now. What kind of soulless monster could be bored in the presence of the mighty Constantines? Green shirt dude, you show up on Monday, I will turn your bones to dust.
MP3:
The Constantines - I Will Not Sing A Hateful Song
You can keep your Salt and your Pepa, I'll take the one and only Spinderella any day.
VIDEO:
Salt-n-Pepa - Push It
The Jet Age wrote a record about a man who "becomes so disillusioned with the state of America that he joins an underground movement and becomes a suicide bomber." Wow, it's like everything Fox News has ever warned us about, but in song form. I hope they write a song about Obama being a secret muslim.
MP3:
The Jet Age - O, Calendar
Those troublemakers in Pure Country Gold chat about their love of vinyl and how chocolate records just don't cut it.
MP3:
Pure Country Gold - The Boss
Plus, a look at the open-minded Sluts and Squares dance night, and a local music news roundup by Cary Clarke.
End Hits: All killer, no filler. Okay, just a wee dollop of filler.
News Good Morning, News!
Posted by Wm.™ Steven Humphrey on Thu, Jun 26, 2008 at 9:18 AM
• The Supreme Court rules that it's a-OK for people to own guns for self-defense in their homes. Lucky for me, my home's in the woods, and that ten-point buck is accused of breaking and entering! YEEEEE-HAW! Pew! Pew-pew-PEW!
• Republican Louisiana Governor Bobby Jindal signed legislation allowing judges to order sex offenders to undergo chemical castration. Yeeee-haw?
• The Bush Administration has lifted sanctions from North Korea. So… this former member of the "axis of evil" ain't so evil after all.
• California unveils a massive plan to promote "clean cars, renewable energy and stringent caps on big polluting industries." Plus, as we already know, married gay couples produce less harmful fumes.
• Astros pitcher Shawn Chacon has been suspended after allegedly grabbing G.M. Ed Wade by the neck and throwing him to the ground. Well… his head does kind of look like a baseball.
• The non-award winning Mercury Sports Desk provides live-blog coverage of today's NBA draft. Look for the Blazers to trade Greg Oden for the ghost of Sam Bowie. What's that? Bowie's not dead? Well, he is to me.
• Wow. These people really, REALLY love faggots. (The following quote should inspire you to actually read this article: "The great British faggot is full of flavour and a great belly warmer at this time of year.")
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