1.FORD FIESTA!!! The troubled auto-maker is to place a huge bet on the manufacture of small cars for the American market, after losing more than $15bn over the last two years. Way to stay ahead of the curve, guys...
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2.DEHYDRATED!!! Private security firm Blackwater plans an exit from its main field of unethical, immoral, and possibly illegal business. If only Portland's private police would do the same...

3.KARADZIC!!! Europe's most wanted man, the former leader of the Bosnian Serbs, is found in Belgrade, practicing alternative medicine under the name "Dragon Drabic." So. How well do you know your acupuncturist?

4.PINT SIZED PROWLER!!! In Britain, a burglar dwarf is caught short...

5.BALE ME OUT!!! Batman star Christian is arrested at London's posh Dorchester Hotel for allegedly assaulting his mum.

Good day.