This Week in the Mercury
Thursday, September 11, 2008
News Good Morning, News!
Posted by Wm.™ Steven Humphrey on Thu, Sep 11, 2008 at 10:13 AM
Today marks the anniversary of the most tragic attack to ever take place on American soil, and... HOLD ON! Kanye West got arrested at the airport?!?
According to studies, 70,000 people may suffer from post-9/11 stress disorder. But that's nothin' if McCain gets into office!
Apparently, not everyone in Alaska hates Sarah Palin.
Democratic chairwoman Carol Fowler apologizes for saying that McCain chose a running mate "whose primary qualification seems to be that she hasn't had an abortion." Never apologize for a joke that funny!
A peace march is scheduled for downtown Portland today starting at 1:30. I'm sure you'll be there... unless of course, YOU HATE PEACE.
And finally, nothing stops an Indian-Sox baseball game like the most adorable squirrel in the world!
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In Which Bobby Roberts Attempts to Ruin the One Thing That Made Me Happy Today by Erik Henriksen
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Should Portland Ban Cops From Using Horses and Pepper Spray to Bust Up Protests? by Denis C. Theriault
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New Paris Laws Give Bikes Okay to Run Red Lights; Ooh-La-La! by Wm.™ Steven Humphrey
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Tonight! KATU Wants Everyone to Be Afraid of Marauding Crazy People! by Denis C. Theriault
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"I Have Chickens Too!" by Alison Hallett
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CAT BREADING UPDATE: Which Mercury Employee Succumbed to the Pressure? by Bobby Roberts
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THE ROCK IN 2012 by Erik Henriksen
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