This Week in the Mercury
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
News Good Morning, News!
Posted by Wm.™ Steven Humphrey on Wed, Oct 29, 2008 at 9:09 AM
Stocks hold steady after yesterday's tremendous rally on Wall Street and gas prices sink to the lowest prices in three years? Woo-HOO! Let's break out the cocaine and prostitutes!
Obama leads in four Republican states won by President Bush in 2004, and is tied in two others! Woo-HOO! Cocaine! Prostitutes!
After last night's rain delay, the World Series is scheduled to resume tonight! Woo-HOO! Cocaine! Prostitutes! Steroids!
Led Zeppelin may be reuniting! Woo-HOO! Cocaine! Prostitutes! Metamucil!
Tonight Obama will debut a 30 minute infomercial on all the major nets as part of his closing argument tour. BUT IS IT OVERKILL? (Ehhhh... fuck that. Woo-HOO! Cocaine! Prostitutes!)
Britney Spears' father is granted permanent legal control over his daughter. Woo-Hoo? Cocaine? Prostitutes?
Sarah Palin may not know much about "economicals" or "vice presidenting" but by golly dickens, she sure has got a cute wink!
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