Whaddaya mean President Obama won't be able to completely reverse eight years of incompetence in his first 100 days?

Rep. Rham Emanuel (D-Ill.) accepts the job as Obama's chief-of-staff.

In case you still care... OBAMA WINS NORTH CAROLINA!

A predominantly black church was burned only hours after Obama's election. Oh... oh.

Jeff Merkley is just about to make the announcement, but the AP has already declared him the winner against Gordon Smith. Don't let the door slam your ass on the way out, Gordon!

Craigslist vows to crack down on prostitution. Just don't touch my precious "Casual encounters!"

Way to go, California! You made Ellen DeGeneres (and thousands of other perfectly nice gay people) cry. Happy now?

As a show of congratulations, Beyonce has offered to sing for Obama. His wife Michelle offered this response: "Oh HELL No!"

From the AP: "Jogger runs mile with rabid fox locked on her arm." Where were YOU, Obama? See, he's already let one person down.

Are you already missing the most fucking bazonkers election ever? Then take a quick trip down memory lane thanks to this video tribute from the peeps at BWE.