Hey, what's the weather like today in Portland? Here in Las Vegas it's a balmy 71 degrees next to the pool. So that's good! Another good thing was last night's Tom Jones concert at the MGM Grand... which was, okay... AMAZING. For a leathery old coot, that mothereffer can still SING. While I have vague disturbing memories of Tom cupping his crotch and diddling with his nipple, I can wholeheartedly recommend you catching him live and on stage before he croaks. Until then, watch this.

But on to "Today's Worst Thing in Las Vegas!" And here it is...

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The urinals in the Hilton Hotel Casino are the worst things in Vegas today. The second worst thing? Apparently it's Wm. Steven Humphrey taking photos inside the Hilton Hotel Casino's public restrooms. Jeez, those security guys sure are touchy!

And "Today's BEST Thing in Las Vegas"? Besides the weather, it's... wait for it... THE LIBERACE MUSEUM! Pix and more after the leap.

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I freaking LOVE the Liberace Museum, because it's one of the few places left in LV that actually tips its hat to the city's extremely interesting and largely ignored past. Plus, it's tackerific! Take a look at one of Liberace's hilariously fun whips.

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For the curious, that's a 1962 Phantom V Landau Mirrored Rolls Royce (once owned by British royalty) that Liberace would drive on stage at the Hilton during some of his circa '70s shows. "But wait!" you may ask. Sure, Liberace may have had a mirrored car in order to check his reflection while driving onto stage... but what about when he actually started performing? Check it.

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This is the last piano Liberace ever played before passing away of HIV-related complications. And while the piano may be ostentatious enough, take a look at just a few of the hundreds of stage costumes in his collection!

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Where was this when I was hosting Pizzazz?

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Where was this when I hosted the Election Night Party?

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And where was this when I needed to go to the grocery store to pick up hotdogs? (BTW, this beauty is made from "dried pink turkey feathers" and weighs 145 pounds.)

So the next time you're in Vegas, don't miss the Liberace museum where there's tons of fun and interesting stuff. Wait. Just revised my top choice for "Today's Worst Thing in Las Vegas"... the tubbo guy who just walked by me at the pool, clearly dressed in Hanes underwear and picking it out of his ass.