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Portland's Worst Person


Portland's Worst Person

Our Picks from the Mercury's "Worst Person in Portland" Essay Contest!

Monday, January 12, 2009

Good Morning, News!

Posted by Wm.™ Steven Humphrey on Mon, Jan 12, 2009 at 9:11 AM

A new round of bombings rock Iraq as V.P. elect Joe Biden pays a visit. Said Biden, "What did I do?!?"

President Bush agrees to pass on the message from Prez-elect Obama that Congress should fork over the second half of the $700 billion financial rescue package. [Insert joke about killing the messenger here.]

President Bush lists all of his mistakes in his final press conference which is expected to last until late March.

American automakers are in a frantic race to see who can build the best electric car. IT'S ABOUT GODDAMN TIME.

Obama gets a gay-rights' lovin' minister to open his inauguration, and a woman minister to close it. And yet? I'm still not happy.

Slumdog Millionaire
walks off with four wins at the Golden Globes, including "Best Drama," while Mickey Rourke wins "Best Actor" for his role in The Wrestler giving hope to the Steve Guttenbergs of the world.

Oh, and 30 Rock won for "Best Comedy" which led to this very funny acceptance speech from castmember Tracy Morgan. (DAMN! Tina Fey looks HOT!)


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