So Michael Steele—the new head of the GOP—says he intends to "reach out" to supporters of gay rights. Steele opposes same-sex marriage and backs constitutional amendments banning marriage equality—but only at the state level, which some see as a sign of Steele's moderation. Because, hey, at least Steele doesn't want to amend the U.S. Constitution to ban same-sex marriage—and he doesn't! Unless the states, all of them presumably, fail to ban same-sex marriage. Then Steele does support a federal constitutional amendment banning same-sex marriage.

Keep reachin', Michael.

This is the GOP's new position on gay rights: We will "reach out" to you, meaning "we will chat amiably with you about our efforts to deny you your rights." Michael Steele will use the word "gay" in the same sentence with the phrase "reach out." John McCain will go on Ellen and tell Ellen that he wishes her and Portia every happiness. But he wants to ban same-sex marriage, of course, so he's wishing Ellen every happiness save that happiest-day-of-your-life happiness.

Sorry, GOP, but you don't get any points for being polite about oppressing us.