This Week in the Mercury
Thursday, February 19, 2009
TV How Much Do I Hate American Idol?
Posted by Wm.™ Steven Humphrey on Thu, Feb 19, 2009 at 11:28 AM
I hate American Idol SO MUCH. Even more than I've hated it in the past. I hate the fucking creepy Christian choir leader/military jarhead/slutty slut contestants, I hate their fucking awful plebian song choices, I hate Paula, Randy, Simon and especially that new a-hole Karla, who may be infuriatingly more knowledgeable than the other three, but never for a moment lets you fucking forget it. (Although I still like using the phrase "Seacrest Out!" when I leave a room.)
How much do I hate American Idol? I hate it soooooooo much, I would happily rather listen to this guy 24 hours a day for the rest of my life. (And I would sit there uncomplaining, just like those two hilarious people watching him.)
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Yeah, I think it sucks too ... then I think of Brian Dunkleman.
Poor Brian.
If you were a musician, you'd hate the show even more.... It's unbearable. The judges obviously have axes to grind; at different stages, they criticize the good performances and praise the bad -- this is done at Mr. Cowell's direction -- to stir competition and controversy. Because of the acoustics in the room, it's nearly impossible for the judges to discern pitch. Amazingly, Mr. Cowell is the only one of the four who knows what he's hearing (MOST of the time); the other three weave asinine, inaccurate bravado. It's PAINFUL to hear. Jennifer Hudson was the last great to be on the Idol stage -- she SLAYED 'em with musicality that was so far above the heads of most of the audience and ALL of the judges. After that, the show took a rapid downhill spiral. It's nothing more than entertainment directed at young teen females (listen to the incessant screaming and caterwauling if you doubt this fact), who spend oodles of money calling in votes for candidates who best suit their pubescent fantasies. Sickening.
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