This Week in the Mercury

Up & Coming

Music

Up & Coming

This Week’s Music Previews


Savage Love

Columns

Savage Love

Getting Canned



Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Five Things You Should Know About Today!

Posted by Wm.™ Steven Humphrey on Tue, Feb 24, 2009 at 2:53 PM

1) Andy Richter will be joining Conan O'Brien as the new Tonight Show announcer—so will you people PUH-LEEZE stop acting like Conan's dead or something?

2) According to a CNN poll, 44 percent of you think tonight's speech from President Obama will be "good." That's somewhat down from his inaugural address when 72 percent of you predicted you'd "shit your pants."

3) The world now has Cheez-It Scrabble tiles!

cd9a/1235514319-chzit-scrabble.jpg

4) Hey everyone I've ever dated! A dentist in Florida has invented something that will hopefully make you stop complaining about giving me a blowjob.

5) I look amazingly like Virgin CEO Richard Branson when he's wet!

8b87/1235514368-branson_3.jpg

 

Comments (1) RSS

Oldest First Unregistered On Registered On Add a comment
1
While I appreciate the free porn, wouldn't already having something in your mouth just make it more difficult to give a blow job?
Posted by extramsg on February 24, 2009 at 8:12 PM · Report

Add a comment

/images/adoftheweek.gif

ad of the day

The Handyman Pro - Your Honey-Do Specialist
Don’t let our name fool you. The Handyman Pro, LLC is a repair and remodel service provider with over 25-years experience. We cover all aspects of construction and repairs for residential and commercial clients.go


post an ad

All contents © Index Newspapers, LLC

115 SW Ash St. Suite 600
Portland, OR 97204

Contact Info | Privacy Policy | Production Guidelines | Terms of Use