This Week in the Mercury
Thursday, May 21, 2009
Portland / Politics / Bikes Portland: The Harbinger of Our Communist Future
Posted by Sarah Mirk on Thu, May 21, 2009 at 5:04 PM
Somehow I didn't see this bigoted anti-car, anti-"liberal" rant from Newsweek's George F. Will until today. Mr. George F. Will is a syndicated conservative columnist who has become infamous for ranting against normal American things like blue jeans (which he honestly refers to as "demon denim.") This week he takes on.... Portland!
Read the whole text of Will's editorial and be amazed at his sneer! He sneers at mass transit, he sneers at people who bike to work, he sneers at "smart growth" - placing the policy in quotes as if it's a fairy-tale concept.
"Riding the aforementioned wave to Portland, which liberals hope is a harbinger of America's future, has long been their aerobic activity of choice," Wills sneers. "Its government has been, intermittently, as progressive as all get-out, trying to use zoning, light-rail projects and high-density housing to cool the planet by curbing automobile use."
Will's point gets bogged down talking about LBJ and how liberals were conspiring against cars before it was even scientifically en vogue to conspire against cars, but as far as I can discern through the self-righteous fog, Wills argument is this: today's government (especially Portland's government) is micromanaging citizens' lives. Its insistence on environmental standards and bike friendly streets and anti-sprawl planning will lead to...umm.... communism? That seems to be what he's implying when he sneers at LBJ's goal to serve "the desire for beauty and the hunger for community." Quick!! We must hurry to replace all bike lane signs with American flags before Portland becomes beautiful and community-oriented!!
Hat tip to BikePortland for the laffs.
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And don't forget to visit pbs.org to watch that transportation special they aired last night featuring portland.
His recent blathering has even some conservatives scratching their heads. I've actually never seen him like this.
There used to be an interurban light rail that ran from Detroit to Chicago back in the early 1900s. It actually enabled "sprawl". My great-grandparents had their 20 acres and could go to either city on weekends, car free, 90 years ago. You'd think a historian from Illinois would know this.
George Will is a weird little man, and I never read his bitter little columns. But when he's right, he's right.
Portland planning is about social engineering. Now many people here seem to agree with this type of social engineering, but that's still what it is.
I would argue that building freeways and sprawl is ANTIsocial engineering. And since when is engineering bad?
Mr. Will used to be a somewhat-rational voice in the conservative community. I rarely agreed with him, but at least he was articulate and didn't cop the Hannity-style, "America - Fuck Yeah" attitude. In the past few months he seems to have been doing his best Andy Rooney impression, bitching and moaning about all the stuff the young folks are doing that he can't comprehend. Time for the WaPo and Newsweek to put him out to pasture.
When's the Battle of the Bowties going to happen? (Earl Blumenauer v. George Will, in a no-holds-barred debate about transportation policy.) Earl laid down the gauntlet on the House floor this week...let's see what happens.
Here I am writing to you from Jacksonville Florida, the largest city in the united states, by surface area not population.
I will have to give Portland's sprawl control props. If the cities in Oregon allow their cities to sprawl the way Florida has allowed Jacksonville to sprawl then they just may encounter the following issues;
There is no cultural hub, there are plenty of great places to visit but they are all so far apart there is no point, the city has too large of a surface area for the existing police force to patrol but not enough people to make it economically feasible to add more cops, one of the highest crime rates in the nation and finally they may earn the enviable title of "Murder capital of the United States".
People like Gee Willager are ignorant assholes that have never left the confines of their perfectly manicured lawns let alone the state but still seem to have gross far reaching opinions. Well G. Will you can sit on a car antenna and spin.
Leslie and The Badgers
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