The Supreme Court says it's not okay for school officials to go digging around in a 13-year-old's underpants. Mmm… yeah. They got that one right.

South Carolina governor admits to having an Argentinian affair, and… is it just me, or are politicians getting more creative in their philandering?

Ooh! And check out the emails from the governor to his Argentinian lover! They are much more entertaining and romantic than the text messages between Sam and Beau.

Creepy Iranian election stealer/protester murderer Mahmoud Ahmadinejad tells Obama to stop "interfering in Iran's affairs." Can you believe the nuts on this guy?? Fuck YOU, Mahmoud! (That's really fun to say, btw.)

In a shocking surprise, Sarah Palin proves once again she can't take a freaking joke.

No Duh headline of the day: "China Accuses Google of Spreading Pornography." C'mon… China. Try to keep up.

Speaking of internetty porn… Apple momentarily accepts and then kicks out iPhone porn app! BOOOOOO!!!

North Korea threatens a "fire shower of nuclear retalilation" against the U.S.; I threaten North Korea with a "golden shower of yellow urine." From my penis.

And finally, rest in peace, Farrah Fawcett.