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Thursday, August 20, 2009

I Hope Activision Falls Into A Burning Ring Of Fire

Posted by Earnest "Nex" Cavalli on Thu, Aug 20, 2009 at 2:10 PM

Johnny Cash is to America what the Jolly Green Giant is to peas. He's like John Wayne with a guitar, only no punk group is going to attempt a shot at controversy by calling him a Nazi. If Internet memes completely lacked a sense of irony, were created by Brooks & Dunn and Chuck Norris hadn't beaten him to the roundhouse kick, Johnny Cash would be the one punching people via fists that simply should not exist and curing cancer with his theoretical tears.

He is not however, a videogame character.

I guess I'd be less miffed about this whole thing if Cash were appearing in Rock Band.

There is just something about Guitar Hero producer Activision — a company whose headquarters include a room full of screaming teenage mothers — profiting from the image of the dead musician that makes me want to bathe in holy water. Either it would ward off the army of succubi Activision is planning to unleash on the world, or my bones would be obliterated by Holy Light — a fate preferable to hearing teens say things like "Hey, have you guys heard about this new Johnny Cash guy from Guitar Hero? He's like Fallout Boy, but, like, old and stuff!"

 

Comments (2) RSS

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1
What I don't get is that... well, Johnny Cash wasn't a guitar hero. The man played rhythm acoustic.
Posted by KS on August 20, 2009 at 2:41 PM · Report
2
I agree. Between that Brutal Legend fiasco and their endless franchise whoring, I have no respect for Activision anymore. I don't care if they *did* publish Kaboom! To say nothing of how fucking awful their Guitar Hero games have been.
Posted by tk. on August 20, 2009 at 3:25 PM · Report

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