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Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Good Morning, News!!

Posted by Matt Davis on Tue, Nov 3, 2009 at 9:48 AM

MAINE!!! Maine votes today on whether to reject a law legalizing same-sex partnerships. To our North, in Washington, they're voting on Referendum 71, which would uphold the state's domestic partnership bill. Here's hoping. And to following the trending topic on Twitter.

ELECTION DAY!!! Kari Chisholm rounds up what to look for today. Democrats in general are nervous that the sucky economy could mean the beginning of Republican gains. Never mind that it's the Republicans who got us into this mess in the first place. Here at the Mercury, we're particularly interested in how the Vancouver mayor's race shakes out...we'll keep you posted.

BARACK'N'BONES!!! Breaking: The President got thin:

r1035210477.jpg

DIDN'T GET THE PRESIDENTIAL MEMO: YOU GOTTA HAVE HEART DISEASE TO LOOK CONFIDENT

RUNAWAY TOYOTAS!!! Safety analysts have found 2000 of the company's cars speeding off at up to 100mph without warning. Awkward.

CALIFORNIA AG'S SPOKESMAN QUITS AFTER SECRETLY TAPING REPORTER!!! He didn't do it "to play gotcha," he says.

I JUST BOUGHT A RAILROAD!!! Celebrity investor Warren Buffet makes an "all-in wager on the economic future of the United States." Funny. I said the same thing when we bought our condo.

KARZAI: "I'LL CLEAN UP GOVERNMENT" Just as soon as all these CNN reporters leave Afghanistan. Honest.

KATE WINSLET!!! Accepts $40,000 from the Daily Mail in libel damages after the paper falsely asserted she lied about her exercise regime.

PHILLIES BEAT YANKEES!!! In game five.

MUHAMMAD, THE BIOPIC!!! Just don't expect to see the Islamic prophet onscreen.

BRAWL AT THE WA-PO!!! 68-year-old editor punches young "cocksucker" upstart in the face. He tells Politico:

"Back when I got into journalism, the idea that a fistfight in a newsroom would turn into a news story was unthinkable," Allen said when reached Monday evening. "The guys in the sports department at the New York Daily News, they had so many, you wouldn’t even look up."

THE ONION IS WRITTEN BY WHITE MEN!!! Ah, but how do they come up with those headlines?

Good day.

 

Comments (6) RSS

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1
This HAPPENED TO ME. In my old Toyota. A 1989 Toyota Corolla. It happened a lot but the worst incident was on the 5 South. The car surge UPHILL and wouldn't stop. I put on my hazards, made my way over to the emergency lane and shut off my ignition. Luckily, I was already in the lane because the wheel locked up. I just coasted to a halt. It was TERRIFYING.
Posted by kiala on November 3, 2009 at 10:57 AM · Report
2
Every car I have ever owned had brakes strong enough to overpower the engine. I've never owned a Corolla, but I have owned some pretty powerful cars. Also, there is a gear position called NEUTRAL that will dis-engage the engine from the drive train.
Posted by ujfoyt on November 3, 2009 at 11:34 AM · Report
3
If you turn the key to acc, (instead of off,) the steering wheel doesn't lock up. Not that that is something that occurs to you when you are in a panic situation, but...
Posted by Matthew D on November 3, 2009 at 11:40 AM · Report
4
I couldn't force it into neutral. It was a stick shift. And it was stuuuuckkk.

Exactly, Matthew. I thought I kept my head as best as I could.

And it occurs to me that this reminds me of rape culture.

Blame the victim, not THE FUCKING CAR THAT GHOST ACCELERATES.
Posted by kiala on November 3, 2009 at 4:23 PM · Report
5
Couldn't you just push in the clutch? Pushing in the clutch takes the torque off the transmission, thereby letting you shift to neutral. At the very least you could hold the clutch in till you stopped. I must admit I've never had this happen to me, but it seems there must be something you could do.
Posted by ujfoyt on November 3, 2009 at 5:17 PM · Report
6
Nope. I'd push the clutch and the rpm's would rev like the engine was about to explode.

I did the only thing I could do.
Posted by kiala on November 3, 2009 at 7:24 PM · Report

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