This Week in the Mercury

Friday, November 6, 2009

Savage Love Letter of the Day: She Needs Oral

Posted by Dan Savage on Fri, Nov 6, 2009 at 3:26 PM

I’m a young woman in a committed relationship with my longtime boyfriend, a handsome and VERY well-endowed man. His penis is more than satisfying, but it’s never gotten me off. I only climax when he performs oral on me. I feel guilty because when we make love, I wait for him to finish (and some times even encourage him to cum faster) so he can go down on me and I can climax, too. I can’t cum first because after I do, I don’t like to be touched and then we can’t have intercourse. Any suggestions? I feel guilty for being impatient when he’s doing his thing.

Prefer Oral Over Penis

My answer after the jump...

You're doing everything right, POOP, with the possibly exception of the hurry-up-and-come stuff, which is a bit on the selfish side. But even then I'd have to check with your boyfriend before I declared your hurry-up-and-come routine "wrong." Some people find it arousing when a sex partner is selfish, demanding, and impatient; it could be that he's turned on when you encourage him to hurry up because he gets off on the thought that you want so badly for him to eat you out.

Backing up: most women require direct clitoral stimulation in order to come, POOP, and most women—estimates go as high as 75%—can't climax from vaginal intercourse alone. It doesn't matter how satisfying their partners' penises are, it doesn't matter how well-endowed their partners are. Most women need direct, focused, intense clitoral stimulation—oral, manual, vibrational—before, during, or after vaginal intercourse. Which means there's nothing wrong with you. You can't climax from vaginal intercourse alone, like most women, you need oral to get off, like many women. Since you can't endure intercourse after you've come the boyfriend fucks you first, has his orgasm, and then he goes down on you and you have yours. Again, it sounds like you're doing everything right.


Comments are closed.

All contents © Index Newspapers, LLC

115 SW Ash St. Suite 600
Portland, OR 97204

Contact Info | Privacy Policy | Production Guidelines | Terms of Use | Takedown Policy