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Wednesday, November 25, 2009

News Good Morning, News!

Posted by Wm.™ Steven Humphrey on Wed, Nov 25, 2009 at 9:41 AM

Obama is expected to announce his grand plan for Afghanistan next Tuesday, which very well could be a "shrug" coupled with a "Idunno."

The President will also be attending the Copenhagen climate conference next month to explain how the US plans to make substantial cuts in greenhouse emissions. (Again, "shrug," "Idunno.")

Toyota vows to replace 4 million accelerator pedals that caused cars to suddenleeeeeeeeee… WHOAAAAA! HOW DO YOU STOP THIS CRAZY THING??!?

Roman Polanski is allowed out of jail but must remain under house arrest in his hot tub with at least five pre-teens at all times.

In a shocking upset, Donny Osmond won this season's Dancing with the Stars. Damn it, those Mormons win everything!

Former CNN dickweed Lou Dobbs is planning a Senate run in New Jersey. THERE'S A SHOCKER.

According to Us Magazine, Angelina Jolie hates Barack Obama. So I guess that makes a presidential BJ out of the question.

And finally, while you're admiring the athletic prowess of Thanksgiving day college football tomorrow, just remember they are a bunch of milksops compared to the powerhouse #36 on this peewee football team who nearly knocks his crying opponents back into their mama's vaginas. OUCH!!

 

Comments (2) RSS

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1
Obama's decision to go to Copenhagen is a big deal and very good news.
Posted by CharlieBurr on November 25, 2009 at 11:03 AM · Report
2
I have owned some pretty powerful cars in my life, and I have NEVER had a car that would overpower the brakes. And what is wrong with putting the car in neutral? So what if the engine blows up. At least you aren't upside down in a ditch and dead. I just don't get it.
Posted by ujfoyt on November 25, 2009 at 1:12 PM · Report

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