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Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Drugs / History / Drunk / SEX A Very Seventies Christmas: Part I

Posted by Patrick Alan Coleman on Tue, Dec 22, 2009 at 1:49 PM

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Maybe it’s because I was born the ‘70’s. Maybe it’s because I’ve been consuming waaaaaay too much Welcome Back Kotter on the Hulu. Whatever the reason, it has become my opinion that the 1970’s reek of Christmas more than any other decade.

Upon further reflection, I believe I must draw some sort of sick correlation between the schmaltz of the holiday and the coked-out, shimmering wonder of that restless decade. I imagine the tinsel on the tree flashing and sparkling as brightly as Diana Ross beneath the stage lights of Studio 54. I imagine the bacchanalia now generally reserved for the office Holiday party as an everyday event in the bars and rec rooms of that long lost era.

So when Christmas comes around, I allow nostalgia to take hold and deck my personal halls with subtle shades of 70’s. And while that time-period produced nothing subtle, I must admit I’ve never let myself really cut loose to wallow in the sheer kitschy joy of it all. If I did, it’s possible the consequences would be disastrous. I might start wearing turtlenecks underneath my sports coats. I might grow a mustache and start calling women “honey”. I might begin having sex with random men in the back rooms of local discothèques.

The ideal 70’s Christmas remains a yuletide dream for me. A dream I may never realize. A dream I intend to share with this series of posts. Merry Christmas, sweethearts.

Hit the Jump for the Kinda NSFW Part One!

Playboy Anniversary Issues:

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I used these as stocking stuffers for the orphan Christmas party Kitty and I held last year. Understand they weren’t actual orphans, just eight or so friends who were stranded in town without family. When our pals woke on Christmas morning, wiping the sugary hangovers from their bleary eyes, these issues were there to greet them, and they were an absolute hit. We entertained ourselves for hours on the Playboy party jokes sections alone.
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You know the old saw about Playboy: “I only read them for the articles, har har har!” Well, before Playboy turned into the dumbed-down Maxim-esque disaster it is today, they actually featured some damn intelligent content. That content often reached its peak every year in the Holiday Anniversary Issues. An issue I bought last year contained an essay from Arthur C. Clark, a posthumous manuscript from Martin Luther King Jr., and a piece by Tennessee Williams. And that’s just the tip of the iceberg. As historical artifacts, these Playboys are fascinating.


And there are also naked ladies, of course.

Find ‘em at Vintage Pink (no pun intended) on Hawthorne [2500 SE Hawthorne]

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