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Thursday, December 31, 2009

Another Day, Another Blazers Injury

Posted by Ezra Ace Caraeff on Thu, Dec 31, 2009 at 11:21 AM

Das Boot!
  • Das Boot!

In case you missed the news, the Portland Trail Blazers' LaMarcus Aldridge—the eventual all-star and the team's best player not named Brandon Roy—left last night's 103-99 victory over the Los Angeles Clippers with a left ankle injury. He is currently in "a boot" and is listed as questionable for Saturday's game against the Golden State Warriors.

When Nicolas Batum was lost for months with a shoulder injury before the season started, it was very disappointing. Then Travis Outlaw (foot) and Rudy Fernandez (back) joined the ranks of injured players, things became upsetting. Greg Oden was next, and that was just downright sad. When Joel Przybilla's knee snapped into tiny pieces, well that is when things officially became ridiculous. Oh yeah, Coach McMillan rupture his Achilles, coach Maurice Lucas has bladder cancer, owner Paul Allen is battling non-Hodgins lymphoma, and team mascot Blaze the Trail Cat is emotionally wounded following a breakup with this thing*. An injury to Aldridge—which appears less severe than the ailments of some of his teammates—only solidifies my theory about the team: gypsy curse!

Clearly someone in the Portland Trail Blazers organization stole the precious precious gold from the mouth of an elderly gypsy witch, and ever since that moment the team has been cursed. How else could you possibly explain the team's terrible luck? It's all her fault.

* probably not true.

 

Comments (6) RSS

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1
Maybe someone needs to bathe the locker rooms, practice facilities, basketball court and everything else in holy water. Or maybe an exorcism might help.
Posted by namarchetti on December 31, 2009 at 1:27 PM · Report
2
Props for the reference to the worst mascot in sports history, Stuff The Magic Dragon.
Posted by ElGordo on December 31, 2009 at 1:44 PM · Report
3
Perhaps a different dumb ass team name would solve
everything.
Posted by BOBSLoB on December 31, 2009 at 1:48 PM · Report
4
will someone anywhere relevant please inquire whether or not the trainers are not doing their job? SER-I-OUS-LY.

There you go. Investigative journalism--the saving grace of print journalism. Wouldn't portland love the mercury forever if it found out what was going on? figure it outtttt!
Posted by anony-mouse on January 3, 2010 at 4:25 PM · Report
5
Oops. Too many "not"s in there. I guess my bias is revealed.
Posted by anony-mouse on January 3, 2010 at 4:27 PM · Report
6
It will be great to watch Golden State Warriors, i have bought tickets from
http://ticketfront.com/event/Golden_State_… looking forward to it.
Posted by Maroussia on April 12, 2010 at 10:45 PM · Report

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