This Week in the Mercury

Playing with Fire

News

Playing with Fire

Code Changes Could Snuff Indoor Fire Dancing in Portland


From the Top

Music

From the Top

Hitchin' a Ride with Here We Go Magic



  |  

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Fashion I Have a New Pen. It's Also a Necklace and a Clock.

Posted by Sarah Mirk on Tue, Jan 12, 2010 at 4:42 PM

utter simplicity.
  • utter simplicity.
My friend bought a spice rack online and was surprised upon its arrival to discover a "free gift!" enclosed. "Wow! Wow! Wow! Wow, What a Pen!" the box boasted. "Ultimate simplicity." According to the bright yellow packing, the 3-in-one auto-retractable pen/clock is one that "Leonardo da Vinci would have loved to wear."

Because I am a reporter and go through a lot of pens, my friend graciously re-gifted this free gift. Though the box says the Made in China pen-necklace is fit for Leonardo da Vinci, it is really more in line with the pen-necklaces those kids on Ghostwriter wore.

But that is the only let-down. Yes, it is indeed a pen-clock that you wear around your neck. Yes, the pen attaches the clock with a magnet. Yes, I will be asking Joe Sacco to sign his book for me tonight with my fantastic new 3-in-one auto retractable.

Pen in action below the cut.

Hard boiled reporter, ready to take notes and check the time simultaneously.
  • Hard boiled reporter, ready to take notes and check the time simultaneously.

 

Comments (10) RSS

Oldest First Unregistered On Registered On Add a comment
1
GHOST-WRITER!


That is all.
Posted by Alison Hallett on January 12, 2010 at 4:45 PM · Report
2
Penis envy! (don't hurt me)
Posted by Will Radik on January 12, 2010 at 4:47 PM · Report
3
Dude, did you forget to note the MIRROR? So you can check your makeup, too! Eeee!
Posted by theta444 on January 12, 2010 at 4:49 PM · Report
4
that pen is hot, Sarah!!
Posted by autumn on January 12, 2010 at 4:52 PM · Report
6
Aaaah... footnotes and basic research. Not the hallmarks of smirk. Here's some fucking awesome brought to you by Graham "Nicer In Real Life" Dirkowitz.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lNxhYdWEZHk

http://www.hyperinfo.ca/Sunatori.com/Magne…
Posted by Graham on January 12, 2010 at 5:10 PM · Report
7
Your last name is really "Dirkowitz"???
That explains A LOT about you.
Posted by Abusive on January 12, 2010 at 5:25 PM · Report
8
@Abusiv: Yep, my full legal name is Graham Leonid Dirkowitz. Take that for what you will. I also once punched the sun.
Posted by Graham on January 12, 2010 at 6:01 PM · Report
9
@Graham: You are raping yourself! I demand that it be removed from Internet 6.
Posted by Matthew D on January 13, 2010 at 2:27 AM · Report
10
Also, you forgot to note that the pen magically grants patents.
Posted by ROM on January 13, 2010 at 11:12 AM · Report

Add a comment

Our Friends

Our Enemies

/images/adoftheweek.gif

ad of the day

The Handyman Pro - Your Honey-Do Specialist
Don’t let our name fool you. The Handyman Pro, LLC is a repair and remodel service provider with over 25-years experience. We cover all aspects of construction and repairs for residential and commercial clients.go


post an ad

All contents © Index Newspapers, LLC

115 SW Ash St. Suite 600
Portland, OR 97204

Contact Info | Privacy Policy | Production Guidelines | Terms of Use