The Rev. Jesse Jackson was in Portland yesterday, and he was handing out asses. (Commissioner Saltzman, I'm handing you your ass. Mayor Adams, I'm handing you your ass. Police Union? You got a lot of ass, and I'm handing it to you.) Read the infuriating and often hilarious full account here, here, and here, and stay tuned to BLOGTOWN for complete coverage of the noon protest/march at Portland's Justice Center (SW 3rd between Main and Madison). Today, the shit is gonna get real.

Eight states are planning to kick high schoolers out by the 10th grade and send 'em straight to college, where they won't be their problem anymore.

The TSA will now be swabbing your hands at the airport to check for explosive residue. (And no, I don't mean "sperm." Jeez, you people.)

Toyota is now considering a recall of their Corollas. You know, maybe they should just make washing machines.

Leno bandleader Kevin Eubanks flees the sinking ship known as The Tonight Show—and Hootie (of Hootie and the Blowfish) may be taking his place?? HAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA! OMG, this just keeps getting better and better!!

As we were gabbing about on Monday, Google Buzz has been causing huge privacy concerns and a group has filed a complaint with the FTC saying it violates consumer protection law.

Bill Clinton speaks out against childhood obesity. Ummm… yeah. That's exactly what I was thinking.

Now here's what's going on in your neck of the woods: Sunny in the upper 50s through Sunday! Woot now, let's get NUDE.

And finally, this photo shows a Pizza Hut carryout receipt where the cashier wrote "BigBlack" instead of the customer's name. Dear Jesse Jackson, as long as you're there, can you pick me up a Pizzone?

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