A Jon Mikl Thor Documentary That's Too Reverent for Its Own Good
I went to my first Trailblazers game ever last night and although the energy was great and the guy next to me in Section 300 with a wicked mullet shouting "SHOOT IT!" every few moments was great and Blaze the Trailcat was great, what really struck me was that I have never, ever seen a crowd so genuinely enthusiastic about Taco Bell Chalupas.
As the audience filed out after the game, senior citizens stood at every exit door, handing out small coupons for a free Chalupa. I didn't know what a Chalupa was, exactly (sort of a bastard taco?) so I took my free Chalupa coupon and moments later tried to find someone else to give it to. I have no need in my life for a "chewy, crispy shell" layered with seasoned beef. But here's an idea: why doesn't a homeless group set up shop outside the Rose Quarter every Blazers game and rake in the free Chalupas, since there are probably thousands of people like me who grab a coupon and then don't really want it? The coupons don't expire for a year, a homeless group could hand them out en-masse to hungry people and Portland's homeless would have a few more pounds of seasoned beef in their stomachs every year.
Aaaannnddd I just solved homelessness. Thank you, thank you.