This is the worst kind of sick. The kind that lingers. For weeks. You're not contagious anymore, and you're not sick enough eschew daily responsibilities, but everything sucks and is hard and this morning I sneezed while putting on eyeliner. Nobody feels sorry for you. They're just grossed out.

At some point my Monday evening plans became a bottle of Jim Beam, cranking the heater to 80 and falling asleep on my back watching Hulu. I woke up feeling like somebody had poured cement into my nasal cavities. Doctors won't even look sideways at unpaid interns, so I'm left with raw garlic and a fucking Neti Pot.

Oh, you don't know about this Neti Pot business? It's looks like a little ceramic dohickey used for watering flowers, but really you pour salt water up your nose and then it comes out the other side and you are all better! I really cannot wait until this Obamacare kicks in and I no longer have to futilely water board myself.

So Blogtowners, what hippie bullshit natural remedies do you swear by?