This Week in the Mercury

Scare 'Em Straight!

News

Scare 'Em Straight!

Hales Hesitating on Tougher Airbnb Enforcement


Birdman Returns

Film

Birdman Returns

Michael Keaton, Alejandro González Iñárritu, and Birdman



Friday, April 23, 2010

YOU Decide Our Bathroom Reading!

Posted by Wm.™ Steven Humphrey on Fri, Apr 23, 2010 at 3:13 PM

You may not know this unless you've visited the Mercury offices, but... OUR BATHROOM READING MATERIAL IS ABYSMAL. Old dog-eared copies of Entertainment Weekly, Wired, Rolling Stone, and The Food Network magazine. GROSS!! We deserve better, am I not right?
That's why I instituted the Mercury Editorial Bathroom Magazine Drive™, in which I asked our editorial staff to bring in at least one great bathroom magazine to replace all the ones I'm throwing into the recycling! And to sweeten the pot? A shiny silver dollar will go to the employee who brings in the BEST toilet reading material!
Naturally, our staff stepped up to the challenge, and I've narrowed the choices of reading material down to what I think are the seven top magazines. THIS IS WHERE YOU COME IN!
After the jump I'm posting the covers of all seven finalists, with an example of an article from that particular magazine. Look them over, and choose which one YOU think best exemplifies the perfect bathroom reading material. (The Portland Mercury itself is exempt, of course.)
Voting will cease at noon on Monday, and the winner of the shiny silver dollar will be announced. (And no, I'm not including the name of the person who submitted the magazine, because you know as well as I do that you're all vengeful fuckers.) Okay, look at the covers after the jump and VOTE, VOTE, VOTE!!

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING IS THE BEST BATHROOM MAGAZINE?


COVERS AFTER THE JUMP!!

Circa 1975. SAMPLE ARTICLE: Blasting Caps Explode—Dont Touch Them!
  • Circa 1975. SAMPLE ARTICLE: "Blasting Caps Explode—Don't Touch Them!"

Circa 2006. SAMPLE ARTICLE: 80s Teen Sex Comedies by Andy Selsberg.
  • Circa 2006. SAMPLE ARTICLE: "'80s Teen Sex Comedies" by Andy Selsberg.

Circa 1981. SAMPLE ARTICLE: What Christopher Reeve Will Be Like When He Gets Old.
  • Circa 1981. SAMPLE ARTICLE: "What Christopher Reeve Will Be Like When He Gets Old."

Circa 1991. SAMPLE ARTICLE: Brent Spiner: Designing Data.
  • Circa 1991. SAMPLE ARTICLE: "Brent Spiner: Designing Data."

Circa 2006. SAMPLE ARTICLE: Lots of pix of hot feminists!
  • Circa 2006. SAMPLE ARTICLE: Lots of pix of hot feminists!

Circa 1993. SAMPLE ARTICLE: Morrissey News.
  • Circa 1993. SAMPLE ARTICLE: "Morrissey News."

Circa 2003. SAMPLE ARTICLE: Not a mag per se, but lots short sexy stories by folks Denis Johnson.
  • Circa 2003. SAMPLE ARTICLE: Not a mag per se, but lots short sexy stories by folks Denis Johnson.

Comments (9)

Showing 1-9 of 9

 
Subscribe to this thread:
Showing 1-9 of 9

Comments are closed.

All contents © Index Newspapers, LLC

115 SW Ash St. Suite 600
Portland, OR 97204

Contact Info | Privacy Policy | Production Guidelines | Terms of Use | Takedown Policy