This Week in the Mercury

Accountability--At What Price?

News

Accountability--At What Price?

City May Tie Cop Pay to Greater Accountability


Quote of the Week

Monday, June 21, 2010

World Naked Bike Ride: A Non-Naked Person's Opinion

Posted by Wm.™ Steven Humphrey on Mon, Jun 21, 2010 at 11:28 AM

While a number of pro-naked bike ride opinions were expressed in Sarah's wrap up of the event here, in the interest of fairness, let's hear a contrary view from someone in the "I DON'T GET IT" demographic.

TO THE MERCURY: i hate people and here is why. i heard about this world naked bike ride thing last year when some hippie friend of my gf's did it. it sounded like one of those crazy portland things i needed to witness. so my gf and i went down last night to check it out. it was quite a sight. but as it droned on (for we had parked too close and were trapped), i learned two things. one - people stink. literally, they smell. i now realize that clothing is not only a good idea for practical and aesthetic reasons, but it is essential to mask the stench of humankind. we're talking BO, unwashed hair and butt reek. mulling about i'm sure i brushed against many asses and showered as soon as i got home. the second thing i learned about these free-spirited naked cyclists is that they are totally rude A-Holes! understandably, a crowd of onlookers had gathered and some snapped photos. the cyclists yelled at us, insisting we be naked, called us perverts and flipped us the bird. i asked my gf what the point of the whole thing was. she thought it was a social protest to bring awareness to biking safety and freedom of expression, etc. all i saw was a lot of of rude, smelly people who left behind a trail of American Spirit butts and PBR cans. hey you insolent fucks! if you don't want people taking pictures of you or gawking then don't ride your bike naked (especially in a gathering of ten thousand nudists). goddamned exhibitionists!

mizz beoutch

Any response for young Mr. Andy Rooney, here?

Comments (27)

Showing 1-27 of 27

 
Subscribe to this thread:
Showing 1-27 of 27

Comments are closed.

All contents © Index Newspapers, LLC

115 SW Ash St. Suite 600
Portland, OR 97204

Contact Info | Privacy Policy | Production Guidelines | Terms of Use | Takedown Policy