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North Portland Rising

A Fight to Save a 115-Year-Old Home from Demolition Appears Doomed

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Thursday, July 22, 2010

SL Letter of the Day: In a Word...

Posted by Dan Savage on Thu, Jul 22, 2010 at 3:12 PM

I'm a 20-year-old bisexual girl, GGG, and I have been with my boyfriend for about a year. He is the most wonderful person I have ever met, and I can honestly see myself spending the rest of my life with him. But, I'm writing you, so there must be a problem. I am very open about my sexuality, and my boyfriend is well aware that I am sexually attracted to women and that I love BDSM (I'm a sub). He says that he finds it very attractive that I'm comfortable about my sexuality. However, even though he says this, he tells me on a regular basis that he doesn't think that I'm really bisexual, despite the fact that I have been in relationships with women. I've also suggested multiple times that we explore BDSM, telling him about my fantasies and desires. He tells me that he finds it hot and can't wait to try, and then nothing happens. I really do want to stay with this guy, so for the past few months I've tried to be happy with only having vanilla sex, and trying to at least be mentally submissive, even if I don't get any help from him. This is starting to really frustrate me; I feel like I'm having to supress a part of myself that means a lot to me in order to be with him. It's gotten to the point where as much as I love him, I don't know if I can live like this. I acknowledged going into the relationship that some of my fantasies (threesomes, anal sex) would never come true with him, but would a little bondage be too much to ask for? Does this relationship have a future?

Trying But Frustrated

My response after the jump...



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