Portland Mercury on Twitter Portland Mercury on Facebook Portland Mercury on Instagram

This Week in the Mercury

One Day at a Time

Columns

One Day at a Time

The Week in Review


Comedy's a Joke

Theater

Comedy's a Joke

Profiling Sean Joseph Patrick Carney



  |  

Monday, July 26, 2010

Tech I Rebuke Thee, Technology!!

Posted by Wm.™ Steven Humphrey on Mon, Jul 26, 2010 at 2:43 PM

Dear "Technology": Go eff yourself.

First, our entire Mercury server went kablooey, and we lost everything we were working on for this coming week's print edition. (Not that anything we were working on was all that great... but that's hardly the point!) Second, the blog posting program we use has been acting like my Alzheimer-infested Grandma. I ask it to bring up a new entry, and it's like, "EH?? Gentry? What's a gentry?" Then after I finally publish it, the post mysteriously disappears hours later! And third, OMG, is the freaking internet SLOOOOOOOW today or what?? I've been trying to illegally download an mp3 of the Spin Doctors' "Two Princes" FOR THE LAST FOUR HOURS. Goddammit, what's taking so fawking long?!? Is it traveling through time from 1992??

So EFF YOU, technology! Today you can kiss my sunburned ass (I did some nude sunbathing this weekend, FYI). I'm done freaking waiting around for you, and refuse to use any part of you for the next three hours! (Except of course for YouTube, and this equally slow to download video of "Two Princes." Eff you too, YouTube!!)

Comments (10)

Showing 1-10 of 10

 
Subscribe to this thread:
By Email
With RSS
Showing 1-10 of 10

Comments are closed.

Our Friends

Our Enemies

All contents © Index Newspapers, LLC

115 SW Ash St. Suite 600
Portland, OR 97204

Contact Info | Privacy Policy | Production Guidelines | Terms of Use | Takedown Policy