Ack! Summer was gone before it was here, and now we not only have to start saying goodbye to river days and outdoor festivals, but also to interns Sarah and Andrew. But as they say, when one door closes another opens, and this could be our, and your, opportunity to forge a beautiful new friendship—if, of course, you are willing to work for free in a habitually untidy, often drunken, and sometimes off-color working environment! In exchange you'll gain invaluable experience working hands-on behind the scenes of a real-live newspaper, accrue published clips, learn to handle abusive web comments, and so much more! Applicants should:

—Be self-motivated and able to work independently

—Love Portland and its culture

—Be able to write words good

—Be willing to put in appearances here 2-3 times a week Sept-Nov, and cheerfully complete non-glamorous tasks like transcribing audio interviews and calendar data entry

—Be reliable

—Have a sense of humor

Is this starting to sound like a dating thing? It's not. But please get in touch with a resume, some clips (unpublished or blogging is totally fine, school papers not so much) and why you think you might be a good match for us. Interviews are already being scheduled for this momentous opportunity, so act fast!