In case you haven't noticed, athiests like me RUIN EVERYTHING for EVERYBODY. However, I will not ruin this. What follows is one of the most hilarious, anus-tingling Christian movie trailers ever, in which a small Alaskan town's Christmas is totally ruined by fat, evil athiest Fat Daniel Baldwin. As it so happens, Fat Athiest Daniel Baldwin is so jealous of hunky Christ Warrior Ted McGinley (who apparently competed with Baldwin for the affections of his own Mom... WHAT???), he'll do anything to ruin Christmas—even change a town banner to "Seasons Greetings" and man-handle an adorable child dressed as an angel. YOU FUCKING HORRIBLE BASTARD!!! C is for CHRIST, and C is for CHRISTMAS, you fascist, athiest MONSTER!!!!
"Just because God's out of vogue in the Big City, doesn't mean we throw him away like last summer's fashion magazine." FUCK YEAH!!!!! For that, Christian movie? YOU GET THIS.
Get the best of the Mercury each week in your inbox!