The U.S. goes into muscle-flexing mode, sending a carrier off the coast of Korea for "joint exercises."

At least two civilians were killed in North Korea's bombings of Yeonpyeong Island, making South Korea both furious and nervous.

Protesters are planning on making life for TSA junk touchers very difficult today.

A TSA worker in Georgia is accused of kidnapping and assault—and he wasn't even at work!

In other PANIC!! news: The much-derided color-coded terror alert system may finally be coming to an end. (Yes, apparently, some people still use it.)

They can't all be like Chile; 29 trapped miners in New Zealand are declared dead.

A Texas Catholic priest orders a hit on a teen who accused him of sexual abuse. DIBS ON THE MOVIE RIGHTS!

Don't worry, the person you did not want to win in Dancing with the Stars, didn't win.

Now here's what's going on in your neck of the woods: Another testicle shrinking day, but a balmy 45 and partially sunny for Turkey Day. LET'S PLAY FLAG FOOTBALL!

And finally, have a Happy Thanksgiving with your family, guys. And say hi to your mom for me.