This Week in the Mercury

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

The Existence of Bill O'Reilly Proves There is No God

Posted by Wm.™ Steven Humphrey on Wed, Feb 2, 2011 at 2:13 PM

In one of his low rent "backstage conversations," Bill O'Reilly tries to outwit the Atheists with one simple question: "If there is no God, then how did the moon get there, PINHEADS?" (Yes, he actually ends the question with "pinheads.") His logic: If Mars doesn't have a moon, then why do we have a moon? My two-part answer: 1) We have a moon, because we're AWESOME, and 2) Mars actually has two moons—so I think that pokes a small hole in his argument. Waitasecond, if there is a God, then why did He give Mars two moons, and only gave us one?!? THAT'S BULLSHIT!! And why did he create Bill O'Reilly, who has his own television show, but doesn't know shit about moons? Dude. If you exist? EFF YOU, GOD!!

Hat tips to Wonkette.

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