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Wednesday, March 16, 2011

SL Letter of the Day: You're Gonna Suck

Posted by Dan Savage on Wed, Mar 16, 2011 at 10:26 AM

I'm a single lesbian who has never slept with a guy, though it's been a longtime fantasy of mine. A good friend of mine is a gay guy and though he's hunky and butch, he never had the requisite romp with a girl. After some fun flirtation and a serious chat about expectations, safety, etc., we are planning to have a recreational roll in the hay.

So here's my question: How do you give a blowjob? (Not YOU, Dan, since i know you're not really allowed to discuss your own sex life. I mean how does ONE give a blowjob?) My only exposure has been through watching porn, and somehow I doubt that's realistic. You don't jut stare off into space while deep-throating his cock and jerking off, right? Though my friend and I are both clear that this is a fun experiment and expectations are low, I'd like to give him the best experience possible. I know every guy is different but can you, as a proud schlong-owner, give me some basics?

Thanks.

Big O Depends On You

My response after the jump...

···············

How do you give a blowjob? You put the dude's dick in your mouth, BODOY. That's it.

But you're not interested in giving your gay pal a blowjob—you want to give him a great blowjob, excellent head, "the best experience possible." That's not going to happen. No one in the long, sordid history of blowjobs has ever given a great blowjob the first time he/she put a dude's dick in his/her mouth. Adequate is the best you can hope for, BODOY, and provided you have the hand-eye coordination required to successfully maneuver his dick into your mouth, you can come through with adequate. Enjoy the unfamiliar equipment and sensations, give yourself permission to suck at sucking, take the pressure off.

And, I'm sorry, but this man has been getting head from other men for how long? There's simply no way he's going to be impressed by your blowjob sills—just as you're unlikely to be impressed by his cunnilingus skills. So put his dick in your mouth, wrap a hand around the base, bob up and down on it, let him fuck your face if you're comfortable with that, and encourage him to give you real-time, expert feedback about what works and what doesn't work for him.

It may not be the best blowjob he's ever received, but it will be the best possible blowjob experience you can provide him with. Enjoy!

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