This news story depicts Judge Phillip Kirk of Waupaca, Wisconsin giving a school bus driver the verbal smackdown for sexually abusing some kids—WHILE trying out his his new comedy act! Apparently he's one of those people who think that child molesters are also automatically homosexual... or as he puts it, "Gayer than a sweet smellin' jockstrap." He has more to say on the subject, too... and exactly what did homophobes do with people's penises back in the '40s??

Dear Mr. Judge: Don't quit your day job. Or on second thought, do.