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Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Kids' Koncerns Korner: The Happy Meal

Posted by Wm.™ Steven Humphrey on Tue, Sep 6, 2011 at 1:47 PM

It's been brought to my attention that Blogtown readers are aging rapidly, and are therefore expendable. However, we do appreciate the years of dedication you've given to Blogtown, and hope you will leave at the earliest possible convenience. But before you go, if you happen to know any young people, we'd appreciate it if you'd direct them to our newest blog column on your way out the door. It's called:

kidskk-1.jpg

Hey Kids! Welcome to Blogtown—where we "Kare" about "Kids" and their "Koncerns!" (And "Korners.") Do you have a "koncern" you'd like to get off your chest? Write to us HERE, and we'll post your "koncern." Then our "kommenters" will give you advice on what you "kan" do to resolve your "konundrum." Oh-"K"? Oh-"K"! Here's our first Kids' Koncerns Korner letter from Elsie Minert of SE Portland.

I love Happy Meals. I get them whenever my parents let me. I like the toys they put inside. I like french fries. I don't like the hamburgers. They put pickles on them! Why do they do that? No kid likes pickles! But they're on every Happy Meal hamburger. This is concerning to me.—Elsie Minert, Age 6

Hey Kids! Got a suggestion that will "kure" Elsie's "koncern"? "Kick" it to the "komments" below!

 

Comments (10) RSS

Oldest First Unregistered On Registered On Add a comment
1
KIDS R DUM AND NEED TO SHUT THERE STUPID FACES
Posted by Graham on September 6, 2011 at 2:16 PM · Report
2
Happy Meals are pretty cool, Elsie, and you can just throw the pickles at other kids, make sure there's lots of ketchup on them first! Fun fact: McDonald's grinds up unicorns to make the Happy Meal boxes.
Posted by Todd Mecklem on September 6, 2011 at 2:23 PM · Report
3
This is creepy.
Posted by sarahesterman on September 6, 2011 at 2:41 PM · Report
4
The always classy Mercury with their new KKK blog column. It's a good thing there are no minorities in this City for you to offend.
Posted by Anonymous503 on September 6, 2011 at 2:42 PM · Report
5
OK, I recognize there's a chance that this blog post was referencing the previous blog post about Ron Paul and his "Kooky Kollege Kids." Which would mean the Mercury is only mocking other offensively named groups, rather than being genuinely offensive themselves.
Posted by Anonymous503 on September 6, 2011 at 2:48 PM · Report
6
I am concerned about poor spelling and Steve's well-established penchant for pedophilia.
Posted by guspasho on September 6, 2011 at 3:30 PM · Report
7
UMMMM... what are you old people doing here? GTFO!!!
Posted by Wm. Steven Humphrey on September 6, 2011 at 5:07 PM · Report
8
Keeping an. eye on you Humphrey. And Pedo Bear
Posted by The Showstopper on September 6, 2011 at 6:49 PM · Report
9
Those pickles are to be picked off and used to wipe the krap off your butthole after you've eaten and digested your Happy Meal.
Posted by Tom [______] . on September 6, 2011 at 9:47 PM · Report
10
Accompanying photos should be sent here: evilsteve@portlandmercury.com

Head shots only please ;)
Posted by Evil Wm. Steven Humphrey on September 7, 2011 at 1:02 AM · Report

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